Cow Pat (Photo credit: b3ardman)
I wouldn’t say the tone is particularly high around here, but I’m going to lower it to about as low as I can go without swearing, nudity or hairy armpits.
You know I am currently editing my South Africa poetry collection and I intend to publish it as an ebook. The editing is going well and I will soon have to start thinking about the technical aspect of the operation.
No, that’s not where the poo comes in, but I am sweating at the thought of it.
Actually, that is where the poo comes in: as I am a complete novice at epublishing and will have to learn from the bottom up, I thought it might be a good idea to have a trial run with a small collection of poems that I wrote for fun and don’t mind giving away for free because I can’t imagine anyone in their right mind would pay for them.
I may have mentioned that I have written a collection of poems about poo (you see, dear readers: a literature degree is never wasted); the collection is small and manageable, unlike the South Africa poems, and I think people might enjoy the lighter side of excrement.
I have the following titles in mind:
- On Poo
- Feces Theses
- NO.2 Cycle
- The Lighter Side of Excrement (that one came to me when I typed the previous paragraph)
- Turd Words
- On Poo Corner
- Crap Poems
- The Allure of Ordure
- Poop Poems
- Manure Musings
I would like – with some trepidation, I must confess – to invite you to suggest further titles: vulgarity is acceptable; levity is encouraged; rudeness is not.
Please leave your suggestions in the comment box. Once I have a few, I will put a poll in the field (watch where you step…).
An interesting aside:
While researching the correct spelling of faeces (the English, naturally; but I went with the American for the visual rhyme), I came across a fascinating site which tells you how things should look; and why they look like they look if they don’t look good: http://www.faeces.org.uk/
Wrinkle your nose all you want – like death and gaining weight, we all think about it.
Or is that just me?
Check out the blog Catherine, Caffeinated for self publishing hints and tips. Well done on getting this far!
Thanks. I’ve subscribed
Hmm. The url?
Thanks!
Here you go: http://catherineryanhoward.com/.
Thanks!
Thanks.
The “Feces Theses” sounds good to me
I wonder what that says about both of us?
Thanks for your input.
I must say “On Poo Corner” made me *LOL*…oh, crap…you always make me laugh!
Well that’s no help!
Ducky doo
Hilarious.. How about
Odes to Poo
Poetry in Motion. Or perhaps simply Pooetry?
Actually, what about The Poetry of Motions? Hope you won’t get sued by Andrew Motion…
Some people are obviously having more fun with this than others…
Do you have a blog so I can return your visit?
Scatological Serenade
Feces Theses and Turd Words are my favorites.
I quite enjoyed your suggestions so far, and although the “Lighter Side of..” thing gets used a fair bit, that one was probably my fave. “Excremental Musings” might be good too. Or another possibility you might consider is something along the lines of, “What Does Fecal Matter?” Just a thought…
A good thought
I can’t access your blog; it’s coming up with a 404 page
How’s about Dung Poeming!
I’ve written about pique today. Perhaps that will give you a prompt. Also, I like crap poems and manure musings best. Hey what’s wrong with writing in Sh** Style?
Manure is great. i think you should make it a book of garden poetry as in cow du*g is groovy if you want to grow roses.
Sounds like you could write that one yourself
You’ve chosen an interesting “dry run.”
I was right
Poetry in Motion
Poems to Move You
From Pan to Pen
Excremental Whimsy.
I must say, however, that I like your first choice, “On Poo.”
I rather like yours. It’s quite elegant.
Ode or Odour
How do you do?
Stool Samples
Some people are definitely having more fun than others today…
Dear Diary-a
Potty Poems
Potty Mouth
Ode to a Commode
Dog-doo Doggerel
Loo Haikoos
e
Ignore the e, that was due to crap typing.
Oh, Crap Typing
You, Adam, Sanstorm and Pseu should start a support poop.
With apologies to all the Trekies, To go Where No Man has Gone Before
If you feel musical, The Poo Run Run
For the classic lovers, Et Tu Poo
Some of the other readers who are having as much fun as you are starting a support group…
You should write one about toilet training your sons.
I think I have one!
“Oo Poopy Doop: Poo In Words”
Sorry, Tilly, I’m not very good with titles…
Me neither; that’s why you lot are doing all the work.
This was where I started…. And somehow got distracted. I just wanted to say that Terry Pratchett’s most recent discworld book ‘Snuff’ has quite a few poo references in it, so many in fact that he wrote ‘The World of Poo’ shortly afterwards.
Now that’s a good title.
Darn it!
I think “Crap Poems” is perfect.
And suitable in more ways than one…
LOL!
Feces Theses and Poo Corner work for me… the rest are not bad at all.
What you need is The Bristol Stool Chart.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bristol_stool_scale
what about ‘Arty Farty’?
Do you have one on toilet training?
‘Lotty’s Potty’
or using the pot at night?
‘Gazunda Thunder’
Gut feelings
Delhi Belly
You havin’ fun?
oh yeash!
What about one for the sailors?
On the Poop Deck
Or a travel one
Back Passage to India
Shall I shut up now?
(It’s all over bar the wiping)
One for the dogs
Poodle
What have I done??
Or Poodle Post
I’ve unleashed a monster
Would that be a Loch Ness Mess?
Stop it! My sides ache from laughing
Back Passage to India is my absolute favourite, but I don’t want to offend a whole sub-continent.
What about Scatological Scribblings?
Or Scatological Scanning?
Poop Poems would get my attention.
Thank you, everyone, for the great suggestions. I had a great time reading them all.
Vote here: http://thelaughinghousewife.wordpress.com/2012/09/15/poo-picks/
Oh Feces, I’m late to reading this post… but here are my picks-on-the-poop…
Fecal Matters
Dump it Right HERE
An Ode to Odure
Thanks for your contribution! It’s not too late because I’m still working on it.
There’s always time to shift thru the shite, eh? HA HA
Especially on this blog