Joke 612

25 Nov

Thanks to Grannymar for this one.

English: Aching tooth: This statue is in the w...

English: Aching tooth: This statue is in the window of a dentist’s in Blackheath. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

DEFINITIONS

ADULT: A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle.

CANNIBAL: Someone who is fed up with people.

CHICKENS: The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead.

COMMITTEE: A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.

DUST: Mud with the juice squeezed out.

EGOTIST: Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.

HANDKERCHIEF: Cold storage.

INFLATION: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.

MOSQUITO: An insect that makes you like flies better.

RAISIN: Grape with sunburn.

SECRET: Something you tell to one person at a time.

SKELETON: A bunch of bones with the person scraped off.

TOOTHACHE: The pain that drives you to extraction.

TOMORROW: One of the greatest labour-saving devices of today.

YAWN: An honest opinion openly expressed.

WRINKLES: Something other people have, similar to my character lines.

19 Responses to “Joke 612”

  1. laurieanichols November 25, 2012 at 04:26 #

    Funny stuff.

  2. adinparadise November 25, 2012 at 04:38 #

    :lol: Now I’ll probably be laughing in my sleep.

  3. slpmartin November 25, 2012 at 04:39 #

    The last one was my favorite…hope you’re having a great weekend.

  4. jmgoyder November 25, 2012 at 04:48 #

    That committee one is perfect!

  5. judithatwood November 25, 2012 at 06:28 #

    8-)

  6. granny1947 November 25, 2012 at 06:28 #

    Love the wrinkles!

  7. AnswerIt November 25, 2012 at 06:54 #

    Descriptions of Adult, Mosquito, Committee and Raisin is spot on :D

  8. benzeknees November 25, 2012 at 08:30 #

    Loved this set!

  9. Helen Cherry November 25, 2012 at 08:58 #

    Love it !!

    A great Christmas Cracker list..

  10. bevchen November 25, 2012 at 12:36 #

    Love the mud with the juice squeezed out :-D

  11. sharechair November 25, 2012 at 12:53 #

    oh! number one! That describes me absolutely perfectly. Now I finally understand what is happening to me…. :)

  12. rumpydog November 25, 2012 at 16:46 #

    ROFL! Good one!

  13. Grannymar November 25, 2012 at 19:15 #

    I don’t have wrinkles. The ravines on my face are character lines, at least they curl upwards… Why do you think I laugh so much?

  14. robincoyle November 25, 2012 at 21:01 #

    Wrinkles? I ain’t got no stinking wrinkles. I have frown lines. Perhaps wrinkles would be better.

  15. Katharine Trauger November 25, 2012 at 22:42 #

    Those are good ‘n’ funny! :) Thanks!

  16. Pseu November 25, 2012 at 23:50 #

    Do you ever listen to Sorry I haven’t a clue? Some brilliant word definitions there, might tickle your fancy.

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b006qnwb

  17. Three Well Beings November 26, 2012 at 04:44 #

    Don’t I just love them all…but I love the “yawn!” You’re a clever one!

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