I Just Wrote This

and I’m rather pleased with it; if you have ever walked in a British park then it should strike a chord:

Dog Day Afternoon

Spring day; a walk in
the park: the triumph of hope
over effluence.

I’m An Exercise Freak: There’s A Report That Proves It

I was cheered by a report in the Telegraph* that says dog owners get more exercise than non-dog-owning, gym-going folk.  This is true (it says so in the papers so it must be).  My dog has short legs – shorter even than mine – and it was recommended that he get half-an-hour’s walking a day, which means that I get half-an-hour’s walking a day.  He often gets more, of course, but only if it’s not cold, not wet, not dark, not boring and I’m annoyed with the Hub.  If I’m being honest, if it was just the last qualification we would have daily three-hour walks.  Toby also runs around a lot in the house – she’s standing up: there must be food!  He sneezed; I wonder if there’s any food?  The big one’s home; I bet she makes food.  He likes to play tug with his gezillion toys, which means that we play tug with his gezillion toys as well.   He’s very demanding; maybe we should have had another kid instead; at least they grow up and leave you: we’re stuck with this fella until he departs for that great park in the sky.  Hope there’s less poo up there.

 

Three minutes after being brushed. Typical adolescent.

I was also chuffed to notice a related article which claims that playing Sudoku burns off more calories than is contained in a Hobnob.  Me, I am liking this newspaper.  When I spotted that ‘Comfort eating does work’ and that superdiets are ‘based on myths’, I had to roll around in a box of Maltesers to celebrate. 

I am a little surprised that I don’t look like Posh Spice**, however, given the rigorous exercise & diet regime I have been following.  Next time I am exercising the dog,  I will put away my Sudoku puzzle as I sit virtuously on my park bench, and exercise the little grey cells instead: I’m sure M. Poirot will be able to help me; after all, we look so alike.

 

 

 

*Yes, I know the report appeared at the end of November but give me a break; I’m exhausted from all the walking.

**I first typed,’I am a little surprised that I don’t like Posh Spice’.***  Think it was a Freudian slip?  I don’t; I rather like her, but why does she never smile with all that she’s got to be happy about?  I bet she’s hungry.  She should follow my diet then she could look terrific and be cheerful.

***Then I corrected it and accidentally wrote, ‘I am a little surprised that I don’t loo like Posh Spice’.  Don’t think we’ll go there.