Archive | 08:41

Brain Games & Lame Brains

14 May

Yesterday was my last day of Housewives’ Club: we have officially been launched, and celebrated with sausages and sweets.  We even had something to celebrate, because our first member received a call to say she had got a job and starts on Monday.  She definitely deserves it because she was the most determined of us all and worked her backside off to get one.  She’s a bad influence on me, however, because now she has shown it can be done, I’ll have to do it.  No more sitting around writing nonsense and eating crisps for me.  Motivation is a terrible thing; it plays havoc with your idle time.

The morning started with the usual business of signing forms and receiving information, but then our Beloved Leader* brought out  CRANIUM - WOW GameHave you ever played it?  It’s a cross between Trivial Pursuit, Pictionary and Give Us A Clue, played in teams.  Pity the poor women trapped in a team with me – and the employer unlucky enough to eventually land me.  I introduce into evidence the following conversation:

Me: [Reading from a card] Taking turns, spell the word ‘symphony’ backwards, a letter at a time.
Team Mate: Why?
Me: It says on the card, spell the word ‘symphony’ backwards.
TM: Why?
Me: [Patiently] That’s what it says on the card: spell  ‘symphony’ backwards.
TM: [Even more patiently] Yes, Y.
Egg Timer: Brrrrriiiinnnngggggggg!!! [or whatever noise egg timers make when the sand runs out]

This was the same poor team mate I accidentally stabbed in the face with a pencil: I had to draw a peacock with my eyes closed and when someone in my team got the answer I threw my arms in the air and shouted, ‘Yayyyy,’ forgetting that my eyes were closed and I still had a pencil in my hand.  This team mate happened to be leaning over the pad at the time…never mind, pencils aren’t filled with lead anymore and the hole will soon heal, I’m sure.  I hope.  Someone else had to see to her face because I had accidentally trapped her hand between her chair and mine earlier in the day.  I really like her, honest.  Not sure she feels the same way about me, though.


*This might sound mocking but actually she was lovely; really helpful and keen to get us all into work.  I like her a lot.


Yesterday’s game reminded me of this senryu I wrote a couple of years ago:


Sound Advice For People Alone 

Occipital lobe:

do NOT probe.  Your cranium

you will stranium.




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