Archive | 16:44

Things I Wish I Hadn’t Done

12 Sep


  • Bashed my son’s alarm clock in an effort to turn off my own I was sleeping in his bed while he’s away – no, I’m not that obsessive a mother; I was giving the Hub the whole of our bed because he’s not sleeping well at the moment due to painful legs – and my alarm went off and I thought it was his and I picked it up, shook it up, threw it across the room and screamed at it.  It was only when it was lying shattered in pieces on the floor yet still beepbeepbeeping that I realised my mistake.  Now I have to leave the country before he gets home from t’big city.
  • Assumed I was a whizz in the kitchen.  Clearing out my larder in preparation for the kitchen refurb, I found all sorts of expired and almost-expired foodstuffs: 2000 peaches, anyone?  Um, I mean peaches from 2000, anyone?  I used all the tins and packets that weren’t solidified or blown and came up with a delightful array of inedible puddings, including peaches on a soggy yet stale biscuit base and Angel Delight a la biscuit crunch which looked like the dogs had an allergic reaction to tuna and tasted even worse.
  • Answered the phone to Tory Boy today.  I am racked with jealousy because he was calling from the Millennium Bridge, which I am dying to walk across; and he was on his way to the Globe Theatre to stand as a groundling and see Henry IV Part One.  Notfairnotfairnotfairstampsfeet.
  • Left my poo on my friend’s doorstep (I think anyone would regret that).  I walked the dogs up on Friday and they pooped after the bin instead of before so I left it on the step while I visited her and forgot to pick it up on the way out.  Truly a faux pas amongst faux pas.  That’s one less Christmas card I’ll be receiving this year.

That was my week; how was yours?

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