A Pet’s Tale

26 Jan
Bloody Bat

A bit of fun for you, courtesy of a rather good writing prompt from last Sunday’s Stockport Art Gallery Writing Group‘s meeting.





A Pet’s Tale

Once there was a spoiled young girl
Her eyes were brown, her hair was curled
She loved to use the telephone
To call her Gran and have a moan
About her little night-time pet
An over-friendly vampire bat

She fed him peach and apple pie
And wondered why he did not fly
She could not see that he was fat
So large, he squashed the family cat
Who died and went off to pet heaven
(That’s what we say to girls of seven)

The bat was called Subversive Jim
By the people close to him
He liked to bury his soft face in
The young girl’s neck and and ear and chin
Sneaking blood when she wasn’t looking
For vampire bats most love sucking

We’re almost done with our sad tale
The child, alas, became quite pale
Her blood supply at last ran out
Leaving old Jim rather stout
But he got his just desserts
He died when his appendix burst

The dead cat’s kin (remember him?)
Gobbled up the greedy Jim
Of Jim was left just one blind eye
Now the end is really nigh
Hear the moral of this story:
Owning pets is sometimes gory




7 Responses to “A Pet’s Tale”

  1. musings January 26, 2011 at 05:45 #

    Hmmmm…. interesting pet posts. Are you not liking all the pets, then?


    • Tilly Bud January 26, 2011 at 10:51 #

      You would think so, wouldn’t you, given the evidence? This poem is just a coincidence, coming out of a good prompt.

      I love the pets, honest! It’s their clutter I can’t stand.


  2. Cindy January 26, 2011 at 06:14 #

    *smile* Wry and entertaining 🙂


  3. vivinfrance January 26, 2011 at 07:51 #

    gory-acious me! Where did that one come from? Love it.


  4. kolembo January 26, 2011 at 08:12 #

    Haha! You’re funny! You take words and just go with them, I had to surrender and the ride is manic. You explode stuff in just one line. ‘An over-friendly vampire bat.’ It’s very freeing and good reading,thanks.


  5. earlybird January 26, 2011 at 08:36 #

    Love it! Particularly him name and the image of him squashing the family cat. Had me smiling in my badger grumpiness!


I welcome your comments but be warned: I'm menopausal and as likely to snarl as smile. Wine or Maltesers are an acceptable bribe; or a compliment about my youthful looks and cheery disposition will do in a pinch.

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