Yes You Should; No You Shouldn’t

17 Feb

Image via Wikipedia

The results are in!  And in no particular order, the winner of the theme poll (as opposed to a bean pole, which I don’t think is even a real thing, is it?  How many poles have you seen with beans stuck to them?  Or even made of beans?  And it begs the question: which is the best bean for the job?  Do you use one particular type – green/baked/runner etc [I put in the ‘etc.’ because that’s all the beans I know.  And I’d better get to the point soon because I’m running out of punctuation marks.  Though I must just say this: I’m not racist; or beanist; or even wordist: I didn’t forget this one: a person {not sexist, either} asks a naturalized citizen, ‘What nationality are you?’  Not an everyday question, I grant you; but the person is nosy and probably training for the forthcoming census.  The naturalised citizen replies (in perfect English because they have a much better education system than we do), ‘Well, I’ve been Pole…’]?)

Still with me, people?  Good.  Tell me again what we were discussing…?  Oh, yes!  My blog’s theme.  So, in no particular order, the winner of the theme poll (I stole that in no particular order, the winner is, by the way.  Dermot O’Weary said it when announcing the winner of the X Factor one year.  Spud and I say it during every results show of every talent show we watch; we never get tired of it.  Though I did get bored watching American Idol and America’s Got Talent.  It doesn’t feel the same when you know you’re watching it a couple of weeks behind.  I had to avoid the internet like the play* so I didn’t know if Crystal Bowersox or Lee DeWize won.  I can’t see Dermot getting the American X Factor gig; can you?  Simon can’t rest his arm on Dermot’s chair – because he doesn’t have one – like he can with Cheryl.)  Where was I?

So I was saying, in no particular order, the winner of the theme poll was…undecided.  You lot are hopeless.  ‘Yes’ and ‘No’ received five votes each.  There were two ‘maybes’; one who relished the opportunity to make fun of me (you know who you are; I don’t.  We’ll leave it at that); and – rather worryingly – five people who forgot the question.  Actually, I don’t know why I say ‘worryingly’: we are clearly all kindred spirits.  I’ve never yet offered to make my family a brew without first having to come back into the lounge to re-count the yeas and nays – all two or three or sometimes one of them.  And if you’ve read this far, I’m sure you don’t doubt it.

So, anyway, umm, weeeeell…what to do?

In this case, the editor’s decision has to be final.  I’m the editor.  I’ll, um, I think, err….  Okay, here it is.  The thing is.  Here’s the thing.  This is the thing.***

Okay.  I love change; I really do.  Except in shops’ changing rooms.  The space is always too small; there are never enough hooks; and at my age (earlier post refers) I need a stool – and preferably an armchair; or, given the state of my Malteser bum, a couch.  I love change; I really do.  It’s okay; I know to stop there.  I love change; I really do.  But I hate this new theme.  It was okay for the first hour but now it looks all spare and clinical and clean.  Not my thing at all.  I’m sorry, people: I’m throwing the Duster out.*****


*Macbeth; it must be: what other plays are routinely avoided?  Apart from anything by Tennessee Williams; but that’s just the Hub’s bias**

**Or ‘hatred’, to give the word its true meaning (as interpreted by the Hub)

***I’ve been watching ‘Friends’.  Whaaat?  Great writers steal from other writers.  So do plagiarists and bad writers, of course, but acknowledge the source; acknowledge the source is my motto; drummed into me by the Open University.  Consider The thing is.  Here’s the thing.  This is the thing. italicized, inverted commarised**** and all-round big fat acknowledged.

****I know there’s no ‘r’ in ‘comma’ but I had to add one or the word just doesn’t make sense.  I’m right, aren’t I?

*****I bet that would have been way more dramatic if I hadn’t already changed back before posting this, wouldn’t it?

17 Responses to “Yes You Should; No You Shouldn’t”

  1. ToryBoy February 17, 2011 at 09:45 #

    You know Mum, there are times when I do worry for your sanity…


    • Tilly Bud February 17, 2011 at 10:20 #

      Don’t worry, son. I’m just following in the great tradition of stream-of-consciousness writing; otherwise known as ‘Blurt it all out from your head and leave them so baffled they will think you a writer of genius.’

      Love you (that’s always in my head) xx


  2. colonialist February 17, 2011 at 11:08 #

    *a bewildered and crosseyed meerkat comes out with the following brilliant repartee*



    • Tilly Bud February 17, 2011 at 11:10 #

      You must be related to my family 🙂

      Welcome 🙂


  3. vivinfrance February 17, 2011 at 11:18 #

    Um. Is that my sane friend Tilly in there, or has she been possessed by aliens!


  4. gigihawaii February 17, 2011 at 15:38 #

    yes, I agree, why mess with a good thing in the first place? Keep your original theme; it’s great!


  5. Patti February 17, 2011 at 16:14 #

    That all made perfect sense to me. Should I be worried?


    • Tilly Bud February 17, 2011 at 20:19 #

      No. But I am: I sense competition in the fruitcake stakes. 🙂


  6. nrhatch February 17, 2011 at 16:19 #

    You’ve made the right choice. 🙂


  7. slpmartin February 17, 2011 at 18:05 #

    Tell ToryBoy not to worry…I have it on good authority that your posts are being monitored by British Homeland Security.


    • Tilly Bud February 17, 2011 at 20:23 #

      Charles, you made me laugh out loud. 😀


  8. Cindy February 18, 2011 at 16:11 #

    *scratches head and pours a glass of wine*


    • Tilly Bud February 19, 2011 at 12:17 #

      An excellent solution to just about everything (except how to give up drinking).


I welcome your comments but be warned: I'm menopausal and as likely to snarl as smile. Wine or Maltesers are an acceptable bribe; or a compliment about my youthful looks and cheery disposition will do in a pinch.

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