Archive | 13:39

Catch-Up Time

5 Apr
2009 Five Presidents, President George W. Bush...

Image by Beverly & Pack via Flickr

When did you realize you were an adult? (If you haven’t yet, when do you think you will?)

When I stop feeling the need to answer every WordPress prompt.

Imagine you get a magic gold ticket that lets you travel through space and time to see any band, or music act, living or dead, together or broken up, live at a venue near you. Who would you pick? Why?

I’d go to see The Beatles in The Cavern before they were famous, and tell my Mum to save any tickets or programmes left lying around so we could live off the sales.  That woman had no prescience.

How do you recover lost trust?

Oh, I haven’t been on a train in ages.

If you could script tonights dream, would would the plot be?

Weeelll, I’d probably start with a WordPress prompter and a wood chipper; then I’d throw in all the missing apostrophes…

What is the best gift you’ve ever received?

This question, because it allows me to trot out once again my favourite punchline.  Apologies to my long-standing readers, who must have heard it at least twice. 

I collect American political memorabilia, including the signatures of American presidents (I have no affiliation and will take the bad with the good).  One Christmas the Hub bought me a golf ball signed by President George W. Bush.  I love being able to say, ‘I have the balls of the most powerful man in the world in my hand.’

I Think I Should Change My Email Account

5 Apr
120

Image via Wikipedia

The subject line of an email from The Arts Council: New Handmade Market In Warwickshire.  I bet the tables were hard to knit.

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And another: Arts Jobs: Dorset Smuggler Required.  I didn’t think the cutbacks were that bad.

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A Freegle request to my inbox: wanted: sports car (preferbly a bugatti veyron)

if anyone has a sports car they no longer wants i would be very grateful.
i just thought that other people ask for over the top items, i should aswell

thanks in advance

The moderator wasn’t happy with the request, having this to say:

Please do not type in CAPITALS, as this may be seen as shouting by other members.

I did think about giving them mine, but the poor grammar and spelling  left me feeling they don’t deserve it.  By which reasoning, I should at least own a Ford Focus.

I can’t decide if I’m more amused or appalled.  I hope it was a joke but the moderators do let some greedy requests through (I’ve just split from my boyfriend and I need to furnish my house so give me everything and make it new and deliver it while you’re at it, is usually the gist). 

What do you think?  Was it a joke?

Joke 12

5 Apr

A man in Paris nearly got away with stealing several paintings from the Louvre.  However, after planning the crime, and getting in and out past security, he was captured only 2 blocks away when his Econoline ran out of gas.

When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and then make such an obvious error, he replied:

“I had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh.”

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