The Royal Welding

29 Apr

So it’s all over bar the shouting at Prince Harry.  It was a lovely ceremony. Boring, as weddings always are except for the bride, but lovely.

Prince William places a wedding ring on Kate Middleton's finger in front of the Archbishop of Canterbury

Princess William of Wales looked fabulous in her gorgeous dress.  If I was getting married again (not unlikely as I will soon be a widow, the Hub having walked into the room half way through and complained, ‘Is this *&$£ still on?’), I would be one of those sad women who copy celebrity dresses.

Prince William kisses his wife Kate, Duchess of Cambridge on the balcony of Buckingham Palace

The world and his wife (wonder whose dress idea she stole?) will be blogging about how much they loved/hated the event, so I will instead bring you some interesting facts gleaned from the talking heads who had to fill in the time between first guest arriving at the Abbey (08:15) and last (HMtheQ, 10:50):

  • William is already a prince of Wales (not thePrince of Wales), but the Queen gave him the gift of being his own little United Kingdom: the couple are now known as the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge (England) (a Royal Duke being way up the scale from a regular duke), Earl and Countess of Strathearn (Scotland), Baron and Baroness of Carrickfergus (Northern Ireland)
  • There were 36 Philip Treacy hats on display, or 36 abominations that bring shame on the name ‘milliner’ (the talking heads didn’t say that, they gushed; I edited a little to reflect my disgust that perfectly good material and feathers should be so shamefully abused) 

 Princess Eugenie of York (L) and Princess Beatrice of York

  • Elton John and David Furnish were the first civil partnership to attend a royal wedding though not, one suspects, the first gay couple
  • David Beckham wore his OBE on the wrong lapel (right instead of left) and his missus showed bad form by wearing black
  • I wore a soft grey faux wool overtop and a blue cotton t-shirt patterned with unique bleach stains over black boot cut pants with 2% elastane for easy movement from the couch to the tv remote, and pale blue Woolworths stokies.  My hair was dressed au naturel in a becoming greasy unwashed colour
  • The Prince’s parents’ wedding was thirty years ago in the middle of a recession; there was unrest in the Middle East and Bruce Forsythe headlined Saturday night tv.  The more things change…
  • The police wore dress uniform, hence the Mickey Mouse gloves
  • Wills was made one thousandth Knight of the Garter in 2008, a gift in the monarch’s possession.  All KotGs were invited to the wedding.  Never mind, Mr Blair and Mr Brown
  • They add rust to the cement to make the Mall road red
  • A soldier held the car door open for the Queen at the Abbey.  She looked like a little old lady with an ignorant taxi driver as she tried to tell him she was getting out on the other side
  • Another old lady travelled thousands of miles from foreign parts and slept on the street by the Abbey for four days to make sure she had a good spot to see everything.  Wills arrived and she fainted, was stretchered away and missed Kate arriving and the whole ceremony she had so longed to see…ouch
  • The award for Most Inane Remark By A Talking Head goes to Sky’s Charlotte Hawkins for this as William arrived at the Abbey: One half of the couple is here; now all we need is the bride.
  • A horse called Royal Wedding won the 5:30 at Fontwell
  • To celebrate the whole thing going off well, a Westminster Abbey verger cartwheeled down the aisle:

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52 Responses to “The Royal Welding”

  1. flo April 29, 2011 at 22:00 #

    Didn’t two princesses look like pantomime dames? However, Kate looked lovely but William reminded me of The Little Tin Soldier and so he should have stood on one leg, just to amuse me!Tell Hub not to switch the Tv on yet, it’s showing the highlights..never mind Paul!


    • Tilly Bud April 29, 2011 at 22:11 #

      Dreadful. I felt quite sorry for them.


      • flo April 29, 2011 at 22:17 #

        Too much money and no sense. But teeth enough to share!


    • vivinfrance April 30, 2011 at 06:16 #

      I see they’ve inherited their mother’s dress sense.


  2. gigihawaii April 29, 2011 at 22:46 #

    Thanks for posting the pic of the kiss. First time for me. I didn’t feel like staying up past midnight to watch the wedding, but I am glad it was flawless.


  3. beckysefton April 29, 2011 at 22:55 #

    The bride was stunning. So was Prince Harry. Mmm, Prince Harry. Yes, I know it was William who got married, but HARRY!! Mmmm. Anyhow, I enjoyed your blog post!! I watched it on BBC1 today with Hugh, Fearne and the yummy Chris Hollins (yummier than Prince Harry). T’was nice to see the Police out en masse in London for something happy and joyful rather than riots of recent times.


  4. nrhatch April 29, 2011 at 23:12 #

    Reading this was a treat!

    Those “hats” (above photo) are too Seussian for me . . . especially the pink one on the right.

    It looks more like a lawn or hood ornament than a hat!


  5. sarsm April 29, 2011 at 23:41 #

    I missed it! Well, got to watch the highlights. Dress beautiful. Can’t help but like her.

    Opportunity for the mad hatters to be out in force!!

    Yours is the best report I read!! 🙂


  6. Sharp Little Pencil April 29, 2011 at 23:48 #

    OK, American perspective here. Reminds me of the lavish White House affairs when there are people starving on the streets of Washington, DC. Doesn’t matter whether it’s crowned royalty or greedy CEOs, it makes me ill to watch very, very rich people being gawked at while they indulge in high-priced affairs, ignoring those in need.

    I think William should skip over Charles and be King. Hopefully, he will scale back greatly the role of royalty and allow them to be figureheads with apartments, let the Queen pay for the freaking dog food for her corgis, and allow all that Balmoral Castle land to be accessed by the public.

    But that’s just me!! All you Royal Watchers, I support your love of Queen, Princes, and country. Slam me all you want, because I have it coming!!

    Amy Barlow Liberatore, Madison, WI, USA


    • Tilly Bud April 30, 2011 at 07:43 #

      There are plenty of Brits who’d agree with you. Not me, obviously 🙂

      Ours is a constitutional monarchy so it has changed over the centuries, according to the desires of the people. One thing that won’t change, however, is the line of succession – if you can pick and choose your head of state, you ought to call them ‘President.’

      And I won’t slam you – in spite of our anachronistic head of state, we are a democracy and believe in free speech 🙂


    • flo April 30, 2011 at 11:45 #

      I think you are the Voice of Reason!


      • Tilly Bud April 30, 2011 at 11:46 #

        I’ve been accused of many things but, really…!


      • flo April 30, 2011 at 11:53 #

        Blimey, not you Tilly! Sharp Little Pencil! Do you think I’d gone mad?


  7. Sharp Little Pencil April 29, 2011 at 23:48 #

    Oh, and the hats should all be burned!!


  8. brenda w April 30, 2011 at 00:57 #

    Okay, I had to watch the video twice, and I find the verger delightful! Your take on the wedding happenings is refreshing. You provide a fabulous description of your outfit, but do tell-what are stokies?

    Great post. I’ve been avoiding television, and this is the first coverage of the wedding for me. This moment will be forever marked in my mind. LOL


    • Tilly Bud April 30, 2011 at 07:44 #

      So glad you enjoyed it 🙂

      Stokies are South African slippers. I have about twelve pairs because they tend to stink quite quickly.


  9. Paula Tohline Calhoun April 30, 2011 at 03:06 #

    Wonderful asides, Tilly! I’m loving your wardrobe – might I copy it the next time there is some sort of Presidential wedding? BTW, the general talk over here in the US was that her dress was very reminiscent of Princess Grace’s of Monaco, and I did see some similarities, but whoever she copied – and she didn’t copy any in their entirety – maybe borrowed a bit from the dresses she had most admired – she was a stunning bride! (You might be interested to know that I just corrected a rather amusing typo – instead of “stunning” I wrote “stuffing.” Interestingly enough, when I went to correct it, I typoed the same thing – is that Freudian or something? I mean I really do believe she was STUNNING! – did I get it right that time?) Our youngest son Matt thought she was beautiful too, but he really wolf-whistled when he saw Pippa! WOW! Did she look great or what?

    The sweetest part, to me though, was the Princess’ “WOW” when she stepped out on the balcony. It was so genuine – she really was wowed by seeing the crowd! I would have been too! The Prince smiled indulgently at her – after all, he’s an old pro at that sort of thing. . .

    BTW, Victoria Beckham is very pregnant, and the black outfit was very becoming – lovely and even flattering (no mean feat when one is 10 months pregnant), and not the least bit disrespectful. Besides, everyone in Asia must have thought the bride and her attendants were in mourning. 😀


    • Tilly Bud April 30, 2011 at 07:47 #

      Excellent perspective! Loved your typos.

      I thought that ‘Wow’ was sweet as well.

      They showed PG’s dress on the news and it is similar, though Grace had it buttoned up to the neck and didn’t show any flesh. Kate is like Grace, I think: elegant, classy, understated.


  10. slpmartin April 30, 2011 at 03:12 #

    Oh…I knew there was something I was going to watch this morning. 🙂


  11. Patti April 30, 2011 at 04:47 #

    Somehow I didn’t feel like getting up in the middle of the night to watch the ceremony – but I am very glad to know what you wore!


    • Tilly Bud April 30, 2011 at 07:47 #

      I thought you’d appreciate that detail 🙂


  12. frizztext April 30, 2011 at 05:02 #

    thanks for that good collection of a day’s actions …


  13. Cindy April 30, 2011 at 05:34 #

    I thoroughly enjoyed it and had a good laugh at the hats. Vicky Beckham’s swizzle-stick adornments made me lust for a gin and tonic. I got a text from Liz Windsor last night ‘Soaked in booze, can’t stop singing They Call One Mellow Yellow …’
    Shame on you for the stokies, Tilly!


    • Tilly Bud April 30, 2011 at 07:48 #

      lolololololol! Wish I’d heard her; I’ve never heard a drunk dial call before 🙂

      Shame for the stokies?? Why?


  14. vivinfrance April 30, 2011 at 06:24 #

    Enjoyed your take on the wedding, Tilly – I only saw the actual wedding as Sally’s hub, a bit like yours, wanted us to go out, my first time since arriving here last Saturday, apart from walking round the village.


  15. vivinfrance April 30, 2011 at 06:24 #

    I still don’t know what stokies are.


  16. thehutts April 30, 2011 at 07:57 #

    I got married in black and am still happily married 11.5 years later! Loved your take on the wedding. As Mum says we went out for the afternoon but I have enjoyed the highlights this morning on Breakfast Telly. There was a great piece on a policeman directing the crowd. Does your husband like cars and helicopters as he might like this:

    VivinFrance’s daughter.


    • Tilly Bud April 30, 2011 at 09:21 #

      Sally! How lovely to hear from you. And now I need photos 🙂

      I saw that copper. It’s nice to see the police get a good press for a change.

      He saw that bit but I bet my readers will enjoy it, thank you.


      • thehutts April 30, 2011 at 17:32 #

        Mum will post a wedding photo of me and her on her blog. We failed to get it into this reply. If anyone knows how to put a photo in a reply we would love to know. Sally


        • Tilly Bud May 1, 2011 at 11:26 #

          You both look lovely. Thanks for sharing it 🙂


  17. musings April 30, 2011 at 08:08 #

    I did stay up and watch most of it, but I nearly fell asleep on the couch by 2 AM. It was a beautiful wedding and I confess I did post about it. I have to tell you Fergie’s girls could have used some guidance in their attire. Those hats (dresses,too) really… um… left something to be desired.


  18. vivinfrance April 30, 2011 at 08:47 #

    Just tried on the Black dress for a wedding I am going to in June and it still fits just! Sally


    • Tilly Bud April 30, 2011 at 09:21 #

      And you a mother! I’m impressed.

      Hope he’s on the mend now.


  19. Pseu April 30, 2011 at 16:19 #

    The Royal Welding best man’s speech:

    “In search of something to say I looked up ‘wedding’ in the dictionary, but accidentally looked up welding… but then decided that it was a remarkably good description: the joining together of two steaming bodies.”


  20. Madeleine Begun Kane May 2, 2011 at 07:03 #

    Hilarious! Thanks for the laughs!


I welcome your comments but be warned: I'm menopausal and as likely to snarl as smile. Wine or Maltesers are an acceptable bribe; or a compliment about my youthful looks and cheery disposition will do in a pinch.

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