Archive | 15:05

Duh

22 May
Fire Engine (1)

Image by Dunechaser via Flickr

If your house were on fire, what would you grab first?

My husband and kids of course; throwing them behind me so I could get to the exit before them.  It’s not ‘children and women first’, is it?

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This reminds me of my second OU summer school at Imperial College, London.  I always read the instruction manual and I was interested to note this particular instruction:

In case of fire, shout ‘Fire’.

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Told You They Were Watching Me

22 May
Spy vs Spy

I rescued this from my spam box. 

I think the government hid it there.

I added your blog to bookmarks. And i’ll read your articles more often! Before this, it would be possible for the government to arrest you just based on whatever you were saying, if they didn’t like it.You got fantastic nice ideas there. I made a research on the topic and got most peoples will agree with your blog.

I know it’s not spam because of the truth of the last line.  This guy must have superpowers, to be able to keep me from jail just by bookmarking my blog.  Wonder if he works for Twitter?*

*A little super-injunction private joke between me and 64,999,999 other UK citizens.

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I’ve started mining Facebook.

‎****************ELECTRICIAN*****************
 
Wonder if they’ll take a bag of old clothes for him?
 
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I thought I’d share some email subject lines as well.
 
From the Arts Council:
 
Arts Jobs – Escalator Dance Producers
Arts Jobs – Musical Basketball Players Required
 
I’m thinking of changing my blog name to Whistling Housewife.  I can’t whistle but that’s okay, I’m as suited to this job as I am to those two.
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Joke 59

22 May

Another one gratefully received from Chauncy Gardiner:

A lawyer and a blonde woman are sitting next to each other on a long flight.
The lawyer asks if she would like to play a fun game.
The blonde is tired and just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and tries to catch a few winks.
The lawyer persists, that the game is a lot of fun. “I ask you a question, and if you don’t know the answer, you pay me only $5; you ask me one, and if I don’t know the answer, I will pay you $500.”
This catches the blonde’s attention; and, to keep him quiet, she agrees to play the game. The lawyer asks the first question.
“What’s the distance from the earth to the moon?”
The blonde doesn’t say a word, reaches in to her purse, pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the lawyer.
Now, it’s the blonde’s turn. She asks the lawyer, “What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down with four?”
The lawyer uses his laptop, searches all references. He uses the Airphone; he searches the Net and even the Library of Congress. He sends e-mails to all the smart friends he knows, all to no avail.
After an hour of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the blonde and hands her $500. The blonde takes the $500 and goes back to sleep. The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He wakes her up again and asks, “Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four?”
The blonde reaches into her purse, hands the lawyer $5 and goes back to sleep.

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