Archive | 18:39

He’s Got A Nose For It

26 Jun

Sidey’s weekend theme is unusual angles.

When I was pregnant with Spud, we went for our first scan.  All I could see on the screen was a blob, but the Hub exclaimed, ‘It’s got my nose!’

And he has:

I Wouldn’t Give You Twenty Cents For A Grudge

26 Jun
A Landsat image of Cape Town overlaid on SRTM ...
Image via Wikipedia

What’s the longest grudge you’ve ever held?

I have mentioned this before: the 20 cents it cost us to get into a museum of modern art, on our honeymoon in Cape Town, twenty-six years ago.

On that same honeymoon, I spent the happiest two Rand: we spotted some pretty side plates in an antique shop and it was the first time the Hub ever said, ‘My wife would like to look at those, please.’  I blushed and simpered, and it still makes me smile.



Joke 94

26 Jun

A man lying on his deathbed called for his lawyer, his doctor, and his pastor. “I am going to die tonight, and I want to prove that when you go to heaven you can take it all with you. So to you, my three most trusted friends, I am giving you $50,000 in these envelopes. When I die you must come to my funeral and put the envelopes in my coffin with me.”

He handed the three men identical envelopes.

A day later they each received news that the old man had died.  Each knew they must go to his funeral and fulfil his death wish.

Standing over the coffin one week later, the pastor confessed, “I can’t hide what I’ve done. I took $10,000 from the envelope because the church needed to be painted.”

The doctor began to fidget, then finally confessed, “I took $30,000 from my envelope because the hospital needed a new wing.”

The lawyer was outraged.  “You pair of crooks!  I wrote him a cheque for the full amount!”

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