Scary noise coming from the toilet.
My only excuse is that it was late and I was half-asleep.
I went to the loo last night and I wouldn’t share that information with you normally (rather like dogs on tv, bloggers are never seen going to the bathroom), but I can’t tell you this tale without it.
No, wait: let me start again…I was passing the toilet on the way to washing my hands, brushing my hair, my teeth, slathering my face in the cheap hand cream that keeps me looking younger than my years, when I noticed, over the flushing sound, a peculiar whirring noise. I know there’s nothing mechanical in a toilet so I dared to lift the cistern lid. There was nothing unusual in there, though I’m happy to report it is still nice and clean almost nine months after it was installed.
I waited. The flushing stopped. The whirring didn’t.
I must confess to being a little frightened (it was late; I was half-asleep), so I called my resident whirring noise expert, the Hub, to investigate, giving him as much room as he needed while I stood out of his way, shouting questions from behind the bedroom door farthest from the bathroom.
The man is a genius, if a little full of himself. The noise stopped, but a more frightening one took its place…the sound of a husband laughing with glee at his idiot wife. Turns out that, in my semi-somnambulant state, when I put the brush back I knocked the ‘on’ switch of my battery-operated nose hair clippers (a gift one Christmas from Spud, who that year bought me things he thought I needed).
I always thought the story about the ladies’ personal item which turned itself on and stopped a plane from taking off while they checked for a bomb was apocryphal; now I’m not so sure. She was obviously asleep when she packed it.
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Tags: About me, Bathroom, Humor, Humour, Husbands, postaday2011, Toilet
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