Archive | 11:38

Terminators And Conditions

13 Jul
John Connor

Image via Wikipedia

Do you believe machines will be smarter than humans?

Already happening: I can’t work my phone, my dvd player, my cooker, and almost all of this computer.  Fortunately, it’s not a problem: I have a technosavvy family to operate them for me; and John Connor is hiding somewhere in America right now, waiting to deal with that naughty Skynet when it tries to kill us all.

You won’t know who he is, so don’t try finding him: he has looked different every time I’ve seen him.

Describe a perfect meal.

I can’t pick just a few things, because I like food too much to choose between it.  I’ll settle for a buffet of everything I’ve ever liked

My one stipulation: there must be sprouts.  And roast potatoes.  Steak, egg, chips, at least sixteen different vegetables, a baguette with real buffer, hot, crisky chicken, a milk cuddy, a greem salad, a ga,,on (not too salty), a pran cocktail starter, because I’m a child of the Seventies, a fruit platteau wit los of strawfaierries…sorry, my fingers keep slipping off the keys because of the drool.

I’ll settle for a buffet of all food, from everywhere.  And perhaps a guest, to hold my head over the toilet when I’m done.

Write about your earliest memory.

3 a.m., getting up to drive to Zimbabwe from Johannesburg.

Sometimes, the prompter just asks for it.



Joke 111

13 Jul

The photographer for a national magazine was assigned to get photos of a forest fire. Smoke at the scene was too thick to get any good shots, so he frantically called his home office to hire a plane. “It will be waiting for you at the airport!” he was assured by his editor.

As soon as he got to the small, rural airport, sure enough, a plane was warming up near the runway. He jumped in with his equipment and yelled, “Let’s go! Let’s go!” The pilot swung the plane into the wind and soon they were in the air.

“Fly over the north side of the fire,” said the photographer, “and make three or four low passes.”

“Why?” asked the pilot.

“Because I’m going to take pictures! I’m a photographer, and photographers take pictures!” said the photographer, with exasperation.

After a long pause the pilot said, “You mean you’re not the instructor?”

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