101/1001 (16)

One task completed this week:

Manage ten real sit-ups.  (10/10)

I’ve been gradually building up from one and I reached ten a while back, but Spud told me I was doing them wrong so I had to start again.

We have been encouraging each other.  He will walk into the room and quietly ask, ‘Have you done your sit-ups today?’  The answer is always ‘No.’  He then barks at me to drop and give him three-seven-nine-whatever number I’m up to, plus one.

I did my first proper ten yesterday and I can already feel the difference in my stomach: intense pain and an inability to straighten up.

We are encouraging each other for two reasons: to get fit, and to get girls (that last bit is just him).  He has reached 50 sit-ups, 50 press-ups, morning and evening; and ten pull-ups on the crossbar of the swings in the park.  He excitedly showed his Dad and I the real lump in his bicep that has started to appear; not one of those imaginary ones we’ve been feeling since he was three.

He is also fixing up his bike and intends to ride it many miles every day.  I guess the child is serious.  Those girls had better look out: there’s a new boy in town and he’s got a bumpy bicep.

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Don’t forget to click the links on the right, under 101/1001ers, to see how everyone else is doing.  And think about joining us!

I May Have To Give Up Blogging

Image via Wikipedia

When even my spammers are going off me, I think I need to call it quits:

Is the work for extra visitors worth the heartache?  Buy a handbag!

At best, they are lukewarm:

I appeared to be happy to discover this particular web-site.I wanted to appreciate it for your precious time with this great study!!

The implication being, of course, that this particular spammer was faking happiness and couldn’t appreciate me, no matter how they tried.

Spammers now feel the need to belittle rather than enlarge me.  Who’d have thought I’d miss the good old days of free porn?

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Addendum: readers are advised not to write complimentary comments on how wonderful my blog is, beseeching me not to retire from the blogosphere – on pain of sprouts.  I know it, but feel obliged to pretend modesty.

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Joke 113

A dentist, after completing work on a patient, asked, “Would you mind giving a few of your loudest, most pain-filled screams?”

The surprised patient said, “But it wasn’t that bad!  Why?”

The dentist replied, “There are too many people in the waiting room, and I don’t want to miss my train.”