Dangerous Thief On The Loose In Stockport

4 Jan

A danger to himself, that is: some idiot thought it would be a good idea to steal an alligator from a pet shop.  The insane burglar also took snakes and lizards, including pythons and a seven-foot yellow anaconda.   

An American alligator's foot

Image via Wikipedia

 The shop owner, Paul Williamson, advised that the alligator was not

the biggest animal in the world, but they can do a lot of damage.  They’re very powerful, very strong and they’ve obviously got huge teeth, so if they bite, the next place for you go to is hospital.        Read it here.

Thanks for the warning: if a stray alligator crunched through me on the way to the post office I might not have had the sense to call an ambulance; you know how distracted I get.

Mr Williamson said that two tortoises were also stolen, but they ‘were relatively harmless.’

You couldn’t make it up.

37 Responses to “Dangerous Thief On The Loose In Stockport”

  1. creatingreciprocity January 4, 2012 at 12:43 #

    I once read an article in a local paper about a young man – an up and coming local football (as in soccer) player – who suffered a ‘fatal car accident.’ The article finished by saying he was recovering well from his injuries! A miracle and they never covered that!

    Mind you, now that I think about it, maybe the accident was only fatal for the car? I also saw an ad once for a ‘guilt edged’ mirror. Maybe that could be used in restorative justice?

    I love local press!


  2. vivinfrance January 4, 2012 at 13:04 #

    You live in a very strange place, Tilly.


    • Tilly Bud January 5, 2012 at 13:00 #

      I live in a very ordinary place; that’s why I notice these things 🙂


  3. jmgoyder January 4, 2012 at 13:42 #



  4. mairedubhtx January 4, 2012 at 14:35 #

    This should be filed under “stupid criminals.”


  5. BeckySefton January 4, 2012 at 15:13 #

    What idiots! What do they think they’ll do with an alligator?!


    • Pseu January 5, 2012 at 14:50 #

      ‘bring me an alligator sandwich and make it snappy’


  6. laurieanichols January 4, 2012 at 15:56 #

    I didn’t realize that you lived in an exotic place. The people of your town apparently like the high maintenance pet rather than your average tweety bird, kitty or even gerbil. Keep your kitty cat in the house, pythons and anacondas on the loose bode disaster for household pets.


  7. granny1947 January 4, 2012 at 16:17 #

    Are you living in Africa?????


  8. earlybird January 4, 2012 at 17:11 #



  9. gigihawaii January 4, 2012 at 17:45 #

    Crazy! What does he plan to do with all these animals? Can’t play with them. Can’t sell them. Nuts!


  10. Lorna's Voice January 4, 2012 at 18:03 #

    I bet that crime is going to come back and bite them!


    • Tilly Bud January 5, 2012 at 13:03 #

      That’s as groanworthy as any of mine 🙂


  11. Pseu January 4, 2012 at 18:04 #

    ophiophilists are madder than those with ailurophilia


  12. SchmidleysScribbling January 4, 2012 at 19:21 #

    I thought Britain had stricter laws about selling these creatures. It is cruel to them and to anything they bite with those long teeth. Unfortunately, we have too many odd things in our waterways here in the States, owing to smuggling. Hopefully, you will get a good freeze this winter to kill off all the vermin. Poor alligator, he really belongs in Florida and is an endangered species down there. I am sure he was stolen and smuggled. Where are the cops when you need them?


    • Tilly Bud January 5, 2012 at 13:06 #

      Hiding behind a lion trainer would be my guess.


  13. nrhatch January 4, 2012 at 20:04 #

    Grabbing gators as “ill gotten gains” is bad karma . . . likely to bite him/her in the butt!


  14. Grannymar January 4, 2012 at 22:25 #

    Maybe he wants to start a zoo!


  15. Yulia January 5, 2012 at 02:55 #

    It is so scary… I agree with Grannymar.. may be he wants to start a zoo or may be he feel lonely at home and have no money to buy pet and well that’s what he did


  16. Hanna January 5, 2012 at 06:37 #

    Maybe they aren’t very bright? Well, that probably made them thieves in the first place.


  17. Perfecting Motherhood January 5, 2012 at 07:17 #

    Must have been some drunk bloke to try such a stunt… I’d be more worried about the anaconda than the alligator. Those suckers make no noise when they creep up behind you and by the time they start coiling themselves around your body, you’re out of luck. Well, good luck! 😉


    • Tilly Bud January 5, 2012 at 13:09 #

      Well now I won’t get any sleep for a week!


      • Perfecting Motherhood January 5, 2012 at 19:12 #

        That will give you plenty of time to blog. About whatever subject to decide to blog about.


  18. Nick the Editor January 6, 2012 at 04:42 #

    Ha! An alligator would not be on my list of good pets, much less pets I would ever need or want so badly that I would steal one. I used to work as a reptile handler and worked with gators everyday – I got bitten by a small one once and the little guy just would not let go of my thumb. Even a small gator that’s only a few feet long bites with a few hundred pounds of pressure per square inch, so I eventually had to get a coworker to help push the jaws apart after waiting for about 5 minutes for him to let go. Not buch blood, but a pretty wicked bruise!

    So yes, bad pet!


    • Nick the Editor January 6, 2012 at 06:52 #

      Snakes on the other hand can make good pets, but an anaconda would be unlikely to fit the bill either, since before you know it that seven foot anaconda is sevenTEEN feet long and eating the neighborhood dogs.


      • Tilly Bud January 6, 2012 at 17:44 #

        I have a story about something along on those lines. I must reblog it one day.


  19. eof737 January 8, 2012 at 11:05 #

    Forget the pythons, I’m concerned about that ANACONDA!!! 🙂



  1. Ugh! « The Laughing Housewife - January 9, 2012

    […] know there are no crocodiles in Stockport…oh, erm, yes there are, never mind…but TB does not get to go bungee jumping again, ever, unless he swears not to […]


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