Archive | 12:31

Ugh!

9 Jan

I showed you the photo of Tory Boy bungee jumping the other day.  I didn’t like the idea but he’s an adult, so I couldn’t say anything.  He will never be allowed to do it again, however – did you see the report on the news yesterday?

Bungee Cord Breaks Over Croc-Infested River. 

Read it here.

An Australian woman was plunged into the rapids of the Zambesi river and had to swim to safety, avoiding crocodiles and untangling the cord still tying her feet together, on the way.  Good grief.  She survived.  Gooder grief.

I know there are no crocodiles in Stockport…oh, erm, yes there are, never mind…but TB does not get to go bungee jumping again, ever, unless he swears not to tell me first.  Imagine how flat his coffin would be if his cord snapped and he splatted into the concrete.  He could start a new life as a pizza paddle.

I read that story and almost lost my launch.

Joke 291

9 Jan

A man answers a knock at the door, but there is no one there. Just as he’s about to close the door, he hears a small voice say, “Excuse me sir, could I interest you in a set of encyclopaedias?” He looks down and sees a snail on his doorstep. 

Angered at being dragged away from a television program by a snail selling encyclopaedias, he kicks the poor snail off his front step and into the garden, before returning inside.

Six months later, there’s a knock at the door. He answers the door to find the snail, who asks, “What did you do that for?”

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