Archive | 12:00

Polls & Up The Pole (I Must Be)

6 Mar
Six degrees of separation.

Image via Wikipedia

Results are in!

According to my readers, the correct definition of the word eubodicly is:

A particularly successful bowel motion

That’s about your level, I guess.

Did I mention that mine was the vote that tipped the balance?

*

You guys are cheats, or I am slow: there is no six degrees of separation now that Google is King.  Many of you found Shanea Vernon by typing her name and clicking search.  Have you no romance in your internet-withered souls?

Well done to Aquatom, at least, who knows Kevin Bacon via the movie Mystic River, which he hasn’t seen (it’s too complicated to explain; read his comment here).

I emailed my friend to ask her to get her Louse to check the business card for details (which I did not want to do, believing that the six degree thing was more fun.  Apparently I’m alone in that), and it is indeed the Shanea Vernon who works for Entertainmentpc, though she is now the managing member, not a sales representative.  I think it is party planning.

I have requested to become her friend on Facebook.  If she accepts, and I don’t get locked up for stalking, I’ll explain to her how a stranger in Stockport came to know of her existence on the other side of the world, and proceeded to tell the whole world about her.  If I’m still not locked up for stalking, I believe she’ll be happy, because any publicity is good publicity, right?  Right?

Where’s my orange jumpsuit?

Joke 348

6 Mar

Thanks to Pseu for this one.

Zelda the zebra had lived her entire life in a zoo and was getting on a bit so the zoo keeper decided as a treat that she could spend her final years in bliss on a farm.

Zelda was excited when she got out of the horse trailer to see a huge space with green grass and hill and trees and lots of strange animals. She saw a big fat weird looking brown thing and ran up to it all excited: “Hi! I’m a zebra; what are you?”

“I’m a cow” said the cow.

“Right, and what do you do?” asked the zebra.

“I make milk for the farmer” said the cow.

“Cool.”

The zebra then saw a funny looking little white thing and ran over to it. “Hi, I’m a zebra, what are you?”

“I’m a chicken,” said the chicken.

“Oh, right, what do you do?” asked the zebra.

“I make eggs for the farmer,” said the chicken.

“Right-o, great, see you around.”

Then the zebra saw a very handsome beast which looked almost exactly like her, but without the stripes. She ran over to it and said, “Hi, I’m a zebra; what are you?”

“I am a stallion,” said the stallion.

“Wow,” said the zebra. “What do you do?”

“Take off your pyjamas, darling, and I’ll show you.”

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