Wasp Season

23 Mar
Tap dancing class in the gymnasium at Iowa Sta...

Tap dancing class in the gymnasium at Iowa State College. Ames, Iowa. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Three momentous events occurred this week: I saw a fly on Tuesday; Molly dog went out without a coat on Wednesday; I hung washing out to dry yesterday.

Spring is here. 

That’s it: no more perfume until November.

I never wear perfume in warm weather; wasps like it too much.  They like it so much, they take chunks out of me while drinking it.  They’re not insects, they’re vampires.  Nice-smelling vampires (I only like expensive stuff), but vampires all the same.

I should have learned my lesson years ago: I stopped wearing hairspray at eleven when a swarm of at least three wasps took a liking to my head during my public tap dancing days.  You ain’t seen nuthin’ till you’ve seen an eleven year old flapper on stage, actually flapping during a heartfelt and slightly off-key rendition of Secondhand Rose.

Here in the UK we have been promised a drought (again), which means more insects (again).

I’ll see you in October.  I’ll be the one smelling divine in a hat.

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29 Responses to “Wasp Season”

  1. Carla March 23, 2012 at 12:16 #

    I didn’t know that wasps liked perfume…egad…may have to stick to bug spray for the summer!

    Like

    • Tilly Bud March 23, 2012 at 12:17 #

      You’ll smell bad but be sting-free. I think it’s worth it 🙂

      Like

  2. laurieanichols March 23, 2012 at 12:25 #

    Does the hubby suffer from the affections of wasps the same as you do? I don’t have to wear any perfume and the mosquitoes and black flies love me something fierce and they leave my hubby alone. When we stand together I’m slapping myself silly fighting off the perverted vampires while my hubby is completely unmolested. The unfairness of it all.

    Like

    • Tilly Bud March 23, 2012 at 12:28 #

      No, but they know he’s a bug lover so they give him safe passage.

      T’ain’t fair, is it?

      Like

  3. vivinfrance March 23, 2012 at 12:47 #

    Wasps don’t bite or suck blood: they STING. But I get the message: they love perfume.

    Like

    • Pseu March 23, 2012 at 19:15 #

      And they can sting multiple times, unlike your bee, which will die after stining.

      Like

      • Tilly Bud March 24, 2012 at 10:46 #

        You two just sucked the life right out of this post 🙂

        Like

  4. siggiofmaine March 23, 2012 at 12:56 #

    It’s mosquitos and black fllies here ! And smelling like dryer softener sheets to keep them away !
    Peace,
    Siggi in Downeast Maine

    Like

    • judithatwood March 23, 2012 at 14:31 #

      Ah, the black fly — the state bird of our fair state of Maine!

      Like

    • Tilly Bud March 24, 2012 at 10:47 #

      Smelling like dryer softener sheets doesn’t sound so bad…

      Like

  5. judithatwood March 23, 2012 at 14:30 #

    I bet you smell just fine all summer!

    Like

  6. BeckySefton March 23, 2012 at 14:36 #

    I never knew that wasps liked perfume.

    Like

  7. gigihawaii March 23, 2012 at 17:30 #

    Well, I guess I am safe since I don’t wear perfume or hair spray!

    Like

  8. colonialist March 23, 2012 at 20:43 #

    I dislike the UK wasps intensely not least because they look to me like bees, and therefore confuse the heck out of me. Wasps I recognise look like scaled-down hornets, with two distinct segments and a very narrow waist.

    Like

    • Tilly Bud March 24, 2012 at 10:51 #

      Wasps in disguise…does a more vile insect exist?

      Like

  9. kateshrewsday March 23, 2012 at 21:50 #

    Barbecues every night this Summer, overflowing paddling pools, and pigs fluttering happily about the skies above the yard, Tilly….

    Like

  10. Brenda @ Fiction with a Purpose March 24, 2012 at 01:55 #

    NOW —- here’s the trick to wasps – I learned this when they decided to use my outside rafters as anchors for their nests…..
    they are dormant after the heat of the day – which means you can seriously walk right up to them and smash them and they don’t even know what happened! It’s like their comatose or something. I knocked down the whole hive (honeycombed and disgusting!) and then smashed it on the ground… they did not even pop out of their holes…

    Like

    • bluebee March 24, 2012 at 05:35 #

      That’s because they were over at Tilly’s…

      Like

      • Tilly Bud March 24, 2012 at 10:56 #

        lol! If I still awarded the comment of the week, this would be it!

        Like

  11. sarsm March 24, 2012 at 10:19 #

    Now if I’d have known this a week ago I’d have sent you the bottle, that was once my nice perfume but seemed to have fallen into the hands of an impulsive boy, who had made it into ‘a stink’. It would have kept all wasps away. Sorry.

    Like

  12. eof737 March 29, 2012 at 05:33 #

    Exciting life and days eh? 😆

    Like

  13. manchesterpest July 26, 2012 at 15:03 #

    The wasp is generally the most abundant and disliked of all British insects. The most common of these are the German Wasp and the Common Wasp. Their bodies have the characteristic black and yellow band across the abdomen. They are fairly large insects approximately 14mm in length. Wasps and Hornets look very similar in colour, although the hornet is much larger in size. Hornets and wasp are extremely aggressive and will string without provocation. A wasps nest can be a problem to the householder or business. Wasps are a nuisance to many people, therefore wasp treatment is essential.

    The sting is caused by an injection of venom into the victim. Unlike the sting of a bee, the wasp sting can be withdrawn from the victim and used again, wasps can be extremely aggressive. A wasp can sting multiple times which can cause anaphylactic shock to the victim. In extreme cases a hospital visit may be needed, if stung by a wasp multiple times.

    Wasp nests should be approached with extreme caution. Multiple stings can be very dangerous. Wasps have a very powerful sting and readily use it to defend the nest or themselves. Unlike bees, which are quite passive, wasps can be very aggressive.

    No matter how big or small the wasp or hornet nest may be, wasp control Manchester is able to treat your wasp problem. Wasp nests may be found in roof spaces, wall cavities and air grates of buildings, hanging from trees as well as underground, wasps are extremely common in the UK.

    Wasps Control Manchester – Wasps Nest Treatment £35.00 fixed price. Wasp control treatment in Manchester, Stockport and Cheshire, fixed price £35.00 no extra same day service.

    Manchester Wasps Nest Treatment £35.00 fixed price, same day service.

    Should you have wasp or hornet problems in Manchester, Stockport and Cheshire, Manchester Wasp control will offer yourselves wasp control treatment at fixed price £35.00, with no extra charge.

    We are 100% confident at Wasp control Manchester, your wasp nest will be destroyed on our first visit. If your wasp issue is not resolved on our first visit, we will offer a free call out. We treat wasps or hornet nests in Manchester Stockport and Cheshire, offering a same day service. Manchester wasp control will treat your wasp problem promptly and in a safe manner, with very little impact on the environment.

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    Like

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Put on your dancing shoe | Solmaz Hafezi - March 28, 2012

    […] Wasp Season (thelaughinghousewife.wordpress.com) […]

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I welcome your comments but be warned: I'm menopausal and as likely to snarl as smile. Wine or Maltesers are an acceptable bribe; or a compliment about my youthful looks and cheery disposition will do in a pinch.

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