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This was posted back in 2010 but it has only just come to my attention.
If you don’t laugh out loud, there’s no hope for you.

Worth Doing Badly

Every now and then I use this blog to drag up some incident from the past that I’m not very proud of, then declare my shame to the entire world.

I think this process is known as exorcising one’s demons. In my case it feels more like exercising them, in that it lets them out into the sunlight, gives them a brisk workout and then sends them back, invigorated, into the dark recesses of my mind, from whence they can creep out into my dreams and whisper “boo”.

Anyway, yesterday’s post about Tinson1 sleeping through the night has re-awakened memories of one such dark event. To prepare you for the awfulness that is to follow, let me tell you that this post is called Bad Dad simply because there isn’t room for the real title, which should be The Night I Punched My Baby Son In The Face.

Here goes…(sigh)…

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Joke 384

Obverse of Diamond Wedding anniversary commemorative coin (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Thanks to Granny1947 for this one.

An elderly couple was celebrating their sixtieth anniversary. The couple had married as childhood sweethearts and had moved back to their old neighborhood after they retired. Holding hands, they walked back to their old school. It was not locked, so they entered, and found the old desk they’d shared, where Andy had carved “I love you, Sally.”

On their way back home, a bag of money fell out of an armored car, practically landing at their feet. Sally quickly picked it up and, not sure what to do with it, they took it home. There, she counted the money – fifty thousand dollars! Andy said, “We’ve got to give it back.”

Sally said, “Finders keepers.” She put the money back in the bag and hid it in their attic.

The next day, two police officers were canvassing the neighborhood looking for the money, and knocked on their door. “Pardon me, did either of you find a bag that fell out of an armored car yesterday?”

Sally said, “No.”

Andy said, “She’s lying. She hid it up in the attic.”

Sally said, “Don’t believe him, he’s getting senile.”

The agents turned to Andy and began to question him. One said: “Tell us the story from the beginning.”

Andy said, “Well, when Sally and I were walking home from school yesterday …”

The first police officer turned to his partner and said, “We’re outta here!”