Naughty Hub

31 May
Customers are Ignoring You

Customers are Ignoring You (Photo credit: ronploof)


I have blogged about cold callers before, and the fun the Hub has with them.  He found a new one yesterday.

An automated call came in.  He usually hangs up straight away but this one was about lower phone prices.  He listened to the whole message and then was extremely irritated to hear, This service is not available to cable customers.  All other customers, please press 2.

The Hub pressed 2 and was connected to a sentient being.  The sentient being, reading from her script, was thrilled to have a new customer.  She patiently asked lots of questions, and the Hub patiently answered.

After fifteen or so minutes, she asked what service he used now.

Hub: Virgin Media

SB: Oh, I’m sorry, sir; cable customers cannot apply for this service.

Hub: Yes, I know.

SB [Clearly thrown off-script by this]: You know?  But…why…?

Hub: I got that automated call which made me sit through it for the information I should have had first, so I thought, if you can waste my time, I can waste yours.

SB: … … …


The Hub is a minx.

38 Responses to “Naughty Hub”

  1. viveka May 31, 2012 at 11:31 #

    Brilliant …. like Hub’s thinking *smile I hate this automatic answering with sometimes 8 different choices/options. I don’t have a clue how elderly people (elderly than me) can manage get in contact with any service today. It drives me nuts .. at least some places over here you can press a number and they call you back.


  2. merewoman May 31, 2012 at 11:38 #

    Don’t blame him, it is very irritating. But still, think of the poor people who are making the cold calls – who’d want to do that unless they were desperate for a job? Must be one of the worst jobs in the world, apart from picking lobsters out of ……….. No, I mustn’t go there. 🙂


    • Tilly Bud June 2, 2012 at 10:15 #

      I agree. I was going to poke fun at them but then I thought about how much I’d hate that job.


  3. misswhiplash May 31, 2012 at 11:49 #

    that was a good laugh… I acn only think that people must be really really desperate to do cold calling or like those girls you see on X rated TV adverts…yuck!


  4. laurieanichols May 31, 2012 at 11:53 #

    The Hub made an excellent point and since all calls are recorded, he may have changed the future of those automated calls, they may be reprogrammed in the near future! I have an excellent career for the Hub, he could be in charge of quality control for any phone service company’s use to lure more customers in or collect debts or whatnot. He would be using his wit and intelligence and doing the public a huge service.


  5. grannymar May 31, 2012 at 11:58 #

    I love it!

    Once when staying with friends in France my hostess had an incoming sales cold call. Much as she tried to put them off they kept on talking. Elly, realising what was going on, piped up with “Give the phone to mum and she can talk in irish to them”! I did. The guy was flabbergasted and didn’t understand the utter rubbish I spouted at him, he soon gave in and hung up!


    • Tilly Bud June 2, 2012 at 10:18 #

      Hehe! The Hub does that with Afrikaans sometimes 🙂


  6. vivinfrance May 31, 2012 at 12:28 #

    Give that minx a kiss from me.


  7. granny1947 May 31, 2012 at 12:34 #

    I think the Hub and I would get on together!


    • Tilly Bud June 2, 2012 at 10:19 #

      I know you would! Naughty minxes together 🙂


  8. adinparadise May 31, 2012 at 12:35 #

    Hub deserves a couple of your maltesers for that. 😉


  9. katz May 31, 2012 at 13:16 #

    Thanks for the laugh! Brilliant!!!


  10. terry1954 May 31, 2012 at 14:24 #

    i doubt if she quit her job and looked for a more satisfying one, haha, hub did good!


  11. gigihawaii May 31, 2012 at 15:37 #

    haha. Not sure I would have done that. After all, you are wasting your time TWICE.


    • Tilly Bud June 2, 2012 at 10:22 #

      He spent the fifteen minutes savouring his punch line 🙂


  12. slpmartin May 31, 2012 at 15:49 #

    Now that strikes me as quite funny!


  13. judithatwood May 31, 2012 at 16:42 #

    Hooray for the Hub! I’m going to remember this!


  14. SchmidleysScribbling May 31, 2012 at 17:27 #

    I’d laugh but I once worked for Verizon and know the folks who handle those calls are not the guilty party. Usually, they are kids who can’t find any other work, bored house wives, or pensioners who need money for their prescription drugs. Still not laughing. Dianne


    • Tilly Bud June 2, 2012 at 10:24 #

      I know they are just trying to do their job, but the daily intrusion into our home, several times a day, becomes too much to take sometimes. Especially from those who refuse to take ‘no’ for an answer.


  15. Elaine May 31, 2012 at 17:42 #

    Good for hub! 🙂


  16. eof737 May 31, 2012 at 20:33 #

    Wicked! 😉


  17. barb19 May 31, 2012 at 23:14 #

    Haha, good for the hub – serves ’em right! Let them see how it feels to get cold calling like that.


  18. Food Stories June 1, 2012 at 05:22 #

    Love the naughty hub 🙂


  19. bluebee June 1, 2012 at 07:06 #

    No wonder those call centre workers have one of the highest stress levels in the workforce. They”re on the frontline getting mauled while their backroom bosses are raking in the dough – I’d rather clean toilets.


    • Tilly Bud June 2, 2012 at 10:26 #

      It’s true; but the Hub always pokes fun politely. He is never abusive.


  20. Helen Cherry June 1, 2012 at 07:28 #

    Good on him I say!!


  21. robincoyle June 1, 2012 at 21:13 #

    My mother-in-law opens junk mail, shoves it all in the postage-paid return envelop, and mails it back to the junk mailer. Making them pay for the postage is sweet revenge. Tell the hub about it. I think, given his love of torturing cold caller, he might like to try it.


  22. benzeknees June 4, 2012 at 03:49 #

    Yeah for hub – somebody should take those automated callers to task. I hate that they don’t give you the information up front so you can hang up on them.


    • Tilly Bud June 4, 2012 at 08:27 #

      I know they’re just doing their (underpaid) job, sigh, but I despise them; the calls, anyway.


I welcome your comments but be warned: I'm menopausal and as likely to snarl as smile. Wine or Maltesers are an acceptable bribe; or a compliment about my youthful looks and cheery disposition will do in a pinch.

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