Molly: A Day In The Life
- Scratch at Mummy’s door but she can’t hear me over her avalanche impression.
- Go potty.
- Bark to wake up Mummy.
- Watch her stand in my poo and go potty.
- Hide in the cushion like a cutie pie.
- Get cuddled for reassurance that Mummy loves me despite what she is sure is a mistake on my part. Phew.
- Love Mummy. Love Mummy. Love Mummy.
- Demand breakfast.
- Turn nose up at breakfast.
- Let Mummy hand feed me my breakfast of expensive tinned dog meat.
- Love Mummy. Manage a sticky lick to her face.
- Love Mummy. Wonder why she’s looking a little nauseated.
- Sleep behind Mummy while she’s at the computer.
- Wake up, irritated by the noise Mummy makes when she falls off her little bit of the seat.
- Love Mummy: if I’m going to be awake, I might as well enjoy it.
- Watch Mummy trying to type one-handed while I sit on her lap for an extended belly rub.
- Sleep.
- Take the occasional sniff at Toby’s bottom, particularly when he wants a fuss off Mummy.
- Drool as Mummy eats lunch.
- Refuse to let her up until I get my tithe.
- Sleep, exhausted from eating my protection money.
- Demand walk.
- Tolerate grooming/harness, putting on of/coat, putting on of/coat, taking off of, harness, taking off of/coat, putting on of/harness, putting on of.
- See rain. Refuse to leave house.
- Tolerate harness, taking off of/coat, taking off of.
- Love Mummy. Love Mummy. Love Mummy.
- Sleep.
- Ignore the weird kid, who sleeps in the room next door to Mummy, when he comes downstairs, eats, grunts, and returns to his hole.
- Drool as Mummy eats dinner.
- Refuse to let her up until I get my tithe.
- Demand dinner.
- Turn nose up at dinner.
- Let Mummy hand feed me my dinner of expensive soft pellets.
- Love Mummy. Love Mummy. Love Mummy.
- Sleep.
- Cuddle Daddy while Mummy’s busy, keeping my eyes trained at all times on Mummy.
- Love Mummy. Love Mummy. Love Mummy.
- Stick to Mummy like poo to her toes as she prepares for bed; she’s going nowhere without me.
- Wait patiently to be lifted on to the bed because I’m too feeble to jump up myself.
- Have extended cuddle until Mummy’s arms ache, her tea goes cold and she knocks her Kindle onto the floor while trying to reach around me.
- Love Mummy. Love Mummy. Love Mummy.
- Sleep.
- Disturbed by Mummy trying to get comfortable on her tenth of the bed.
- Wait until she settles then sit on the most awkward part of her body (varies according to whether she’s lying on her front, back or side).
- Sleep.
- Disturbed by Daddy giving me a goodnight cuddle before he puts me out of the room so he can go to bed.
- Intensely dislike Daddy for separating me from Mummy.
- Wait for Daddy to fall asleep and try to sneak back in, jump easily onto the bed and wiggle my way between them, sleeping long ways to get comfortable; but he’s on to me and he shuts the door properly this time.
- Love Mummy. Love Mummy. Love Mummy. Can’t be separated from Mummy.
- Scratch at Mummy’s door but she can’t hear me over her avalanche impression.
- Go potty.
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