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16 Sep

Another funny man in the blogosphere: meet Al, the Cvillean (that’s his spelling, not mine).

The Cvillean

I used to think I was just plain ole Al. Turns out, according to the Gallup and Rasmussen political polls, that I’m a member of the over 65, caucasian, southern state, swing state, male, retiree, likely voter, white-collar, ex-military, home owner, middle class, heterosexual, married, voting bloc. Not only that, we’re one of the most influential voting blocs out there. Who knew?  From Labor Day until the first week of November, every four years, the way I intend to vote makes me one of the most important people in the country. After that, it’s back to being good ole Al, and the only important thing the government wants to know about me is where they need to mail my tax forms.

In spite of all the myriad polls and predictions, this is the voting bloc that will probably decide it:

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Joke 542

16 Sep
Rob Gonda - The Digital Advertising Landscape ...

Rob Gonda – The Digital Advertising Landscape 2015 – Keynote – (Photo credit: Fräulein Schiller)

From Will & Guy.  Not really a joke, but amusing.

 Funnies From The Small Ads Column

  • A superb and inexpensive restaurant. Fine food expertly served by waitresses in appetizing forms.
  • Dinner Special — Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25; Children $2.00.
  • Four-poster bed, 101 years old. Perfect for antique lover.
  • Now is your chance to have your ears pierced. Get an extra pair to take home.
  • Wanted: 50 girls for stripping machine operators in factory.
  • Wanted: Unmarried girls to pick fresh fruit and produce at night.
  • We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it carefully by hand.
  • Tired of cleaning yourself? Let me do it.
  • For Sale. Three canaries of undermined sex.
  • Lost: small apricot poodle. Reward. Neutered. Like one of the family.
  • For Sale — Eight puppies from a German Shepherd and an Alaskan Hussy.
  • Great Dames for sale.
  • Have several very old dresses from grandmother in beautiful condition.
  • For sale: an antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers.
  • Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children.
  • Mt. Kilimanjaro, the breathtaking backdrop for the Serena Lodge. Swim in the lovely pool while you drink it all in.
  • Sheer stockings. Designed for fancy dress, but so serviceable that lots of women wear nothing else.

Quotes from bizcommunity.com

  • I have always believed that writing advertisements is the second most profitable form of writing. The first, of course, is ransom notes ~ Philip Dusenberry, quoted in Eric Clark, The Want Makers: Inside the World of Advertising, 1988.
  • I saw a subliminal advertising executive, but only for a second.
  • Advertising sure brings quick results — last week I advertised for a night watchman — the same night my safe was robbed.
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