Archive | 10:25

Another Best Gift Ever

5 Oct

Did I not promise you I would blather on and on about my birthday?  Am I not a woman of my word?

I can’t let it go because I received so many lovely gifts, I have to share them all with you.  And because it gives me something to blog about when the ideas box is empty.

Elaine asked if you would see the beautiful jumper Viv sent me.

Yes, you will.  You would have seen it yesterday but the self-portrait I took of me wearing it was so awful, I didn’t want to share it.  As I have shown you some horrendous pictures of me in the past, you know it must be bad.

I would have taken a photo of the jumper on its own but I was wearing it and I didn’t want to take it off.  I haven’t taken it off since it arrived, except for sleeping and showering (which I needed to do because I haven’t taken off the jumper since it arrived).  The only reason you get a pic today is because I’m blogging in my pyjamas (if my ideas box stays empty, you may get a post about my pyjamas.  I’m definitely planning one about my slippers).

Here it is:

I love it.  Chunky cable knit with an owl – how could I not?  Best gift ever.  Thank you again, Viv.

I also received virtual gifts.  Elizabeth gave me an amazing doodle:

“Happy Belated Birthday to you! :-)
¸¸.•*¨*•░H░A░P░P░Y░(¯`’•.¸ *♥♥♥* ¸.•’´¯) ░B░I░R░ T░H░D░A░Y░ (¯`’•.¸*♥♥♥*¸.•’´¯) Hope you enjoyed YOUR special day!
║╚╦═╦═╦═╦╦╗ ║╚╦═╦═╦═╦╦╗ ║╚╦╦═╣╚╣╚╦╝╠═╦╦╗
║║║╬║╬║╬║║║ ║║║╬║╬║╬║║║ ║╬║║╔╣╔╣║║╬║╬║║║
╚╩╩╩╣╔╣╔╩╗║ ╚╩╩╩╣╔╣╔╩╗║ ╚═╩╩╝╚═╩╩╩═╩╩╩╗║
¸.•*¨*•.♪♫♫♪Happy Birthday .♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸ ♥Happy Birthday to youuuuu ♪♫•*¨*•.¸.•*¨*•♫

Momopolize gave me a link to the greatest cake ever made:

See the decorations at the bottom?  If you don’t know what they are, go here for a close-up.

I received many, many good wishes from you, my lovely readers; thank you.  I really do appreciate them.

And finally, this, from Janie Jones:

You’re so ugly,

You’re so ugly,

You’re such an ugly child.

The clothes you wear are way out of style.

You look like an ape every time that you smile.

Oh how I hate you,

You alligator bait, you.

Why don’t you dry up and die?

You’re just a knock-kneed, pigeon-toed, worn out shoe,

There was a curse on your family and it fell on you.

Your teeth are yellow,

You don’t smell mellow,

You’re such an ug-aaa-leee chiiiiiild!

She must have seen that photo I suppressed.

As Miss Whiplash commented, my friends sure do know how to show their appreciation.  Go on over to Janie’s original post and thank her for me.

And no abuse!  She totally gets me.  I thought it was hilarious.  I’m considering eating a Malteser in her honour.  I might take a photo of me doing it.  

On the other hand, I don’t want to get chocolate on my lovely new jumper…

Joke 561

5 Oct

From Will & Guy.

Mohandas K. Gandhi

Mohandas K. Gandhi (Photo credit: Dunechaser)

Famous people can be funny…

  • Gandhi was once asked what he thought of Western Civilisation. Gandhi replied, “I think that it would be a very good idea.”
  • Nobody believes the official spokesman…but everybody trusts an unidentified source. – Ron Nesen
  • The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible. – George Burns
  • There’s a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot. – Steven Wright
  • Diplomacy is the art of saying, ‘Nice doggie’ until you can find a rock. – Will Rogers
  • You know, you can’t please all the people all the time… and last night, all those people were at my show. – Mitch Hedberg
  • Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake. – Napoleon Bonaparte

Sports men are particularly amusing…

  • New Orleans Saint RB George Rogers when asked about the upcoming season: “I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever comes first.”
  • Senior basketball player at the University of Pittsburgh: “I’m going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes.”
  • “Shaquille O’Neal on whether he had visited the Parthenon during his visit to Greece: “I can’t really remember the names of the clubs that we went to.”
  • Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach: “You guys line up alphabetically by height.” And “You guys pair up in groups of three, then line up in a circle.”
  • Lou Duva, veteran boxing trainer, on the Spartan training regime of heavyweight Andrew Golota: “He’s a guy who gets up at six o’clock in the morning regardless of what time it is.”
  • Chuck Nevitt, North Carolina State basketball player, explaining to Coach Jim Valvano why he appeared nervous at practice: “My sister’s expecting a baby, and I don’t know if I’m going to be an uncle or an aunt.”
  • Frank Layden, Utah Jazz president, on a former player: “I told him, ‘Son, what is it with you? Is it ignorance or apathy?’ He said, ‘Coach, I don’t know and I don’t care.’
  • Torrin Polk, University of Houston receiver, on his coach, John Jenkins: “He treats us like men. He lets us wear earrings.”

And our own Murray Walker, Formula 1 Commentator, is up there with the best…

  • “He’s obviously gone in for a wheel change. I say obviously because I can’t see it.”
  • “With half the race gone, there is half the race still to go.”
  • “Do my eyes deceive me, or is Senna’s Lotus sounding rough?”
  • “As you look at the first four, the significant thing is that Alboreto is fifth.”
  • “He is shedding buckets of adrenalin in that car.”
  • “…And I interrupt myself to bring you this….”
  • “This is an interesting circuit because it has inclines, and not just up, but down as well.”
  • “Only a few more laps to go and then the action will begin, unless this is the action, which it is.”
  • “Tambay’s hopes, which were nil before, are absolutely zero now.” 
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