Joke 578

22 Oct

These are for an old school friend who is a statistician and sometimes reads my blog.  The law of averages suggests he won’t read it today, but you never know.

The inside of a hot air balloon's envelope, se...

The inside of a hot air balloon’s envelope, seen from the gondola. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The first one is from statisticsjokes.

A historian, an engineer and a statistician are duck hunting.  A duck rises from the lake.

The historian fires first, and shoots 10′ over the duck.

Then the engineer shoulders the shotgun and shoots 10′ under the duck.

The statistician exclaims “Got him!”

This one is from stats.stackexchange.com.

A guy is flying in a hot air balloon and he’s lost.  He lowers himself over a field and shouts to another guy on the ground, “Can you tell me where I am, and which way I’m headed?”

“Sure!  You’re at 43 degrees, 12 minutes, 21.2 seconds north; 123 degrees, 8 minutes, 12.8 seconds west.  You’re at 212 meters above sea level.  Right now, you’re hovering, but on your way in here you were at a speed of 1.83 meters per second at 1.929 radians.”

“Thanks!  By the way, are you a statistician?”

“I am!  But how did you know?”

“Everything you’ve told me is completely accurate; you gave me more detail than I needed, and you told me in such a way that it’s no use to me at all!”

“Dang!  By the way, are you a principal investigator?”

“I am!  How’d you know that?”

“You don’t know where you are, you don’t know where you’re going.  You got where you are by blowing hot air, you start asking questions after you get into trouble, and you’re in exactly the same spot you were a few minutes ago, but now, somehow, it’s my fault.”

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8 Responses to “Joke 578”

  1. terry1954 October 22, 2012 at 04:16 #

    haha, funny and so true

    Like

  2. slpmartin October 22, 2012 at 04:27 #

    Since statistics was my cognate area at the university…I found the second one particularly funny given I’ve had to work with a number of PIs…thanks for the laughs.

    Like

  3. Judith Atwood October 22, 2012 at 04:37 #

    Good ones! 😎

    Like

  4. Kate Kresse October 22, 2012 at 06:01 #

    oh gosh, love it tilly!!

    Like

  5. viveka October 23, 2012 at 13:59 #

    A poor Swede … really enjoyed those … specially the last one. Thanks … from Sweden.

    Like

  6. Grannymar October 23, 2012 at 18:06 #

    That guy in the hot air balloon needs GPS .. At the next hedge turn right! 😆

    Like

  7. dwc63 October 27, 2012 at 19:54 #

    Hi Linda, Yes you were right, the law of averages prevails again: got to it 5 days later. Which is probably the frequency I look at your blog (but I also do a 4 day retrospective review at the same time). Thanks for sharing those. The second one was spot on – falls well within my current line of business. I have a few other stato jokes that I will post next time I am on 🙂

    Like

I welcome your comments but be warned: I'm menopausal and as likely to snarl as smile. Wine or Maltesers are an acceptable bribe; or a compliment about my youthful looks and cheery disposition will do in a pinch.

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