Joke 579

23 Oct
English: The Eiffel Tower from below.

The Eiffel Tower from below. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

From my friend Cliff.  

Thank you, Cliff, for being such a great supplier of jokes.

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True Definitions

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1.  ARBITRATOR: A cook that leaves Arby’s to work at McDonalds

2.  AVOIDABLE: What a bullfighter tries to do

3.  BERNADETTE: The act of torching a mortgage

4.  BURGLARIZE: What a crook sees with

5.  CONTROL: A short, ugly inmate

6.  COUNTERFEITERS: Workers who put together kitchen cabinets

7.  ECLIPSE: What an English barber does for a living

8.  EYEDROPPER: A clumsy ophthalmologist

9.  HEROES: What a guy in a boat does

10. LEFTBANK: What the robber did when his bag was full of
……money

11. MISTY: How golfers create divots

12. PARADOX: Two physicians

13. PARASITES: What you see from the top of the Eiffel Tower

14. PHARMACIST: A helper on the farm

15. POLARIZE: What penguins see with

16. PRIMATE: Removing your spouse from in front of the TV

17. RELIEF: What trees do in the spring

18. RUBBERNECK: What you do to relax your wife

19. SELFISH: What the owner of a seafood store does

20. SUDAFED: Brought litigation against a government official

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8 Responses to “Joke 579”

  1. benzeknees October 23, 2012 at 06:59 #

    Some of these I had to read twice to get but they were real corkers!

    Like

  2. viveka October 23, 2012 at 10:47 #

    Me, the poor Swede is lost again … but that doesn’t really matter …. *smile – we live in a crazy world with free speech. *laughing.

    Like

  3. Grannymar October 23, 2012 at 18:19 #

    I luv ’em, they are right up my street!

    Like

  4. Rorybore October 23, 2012 at 18:39 #

    I love these!! “avoidable” had me laughing for probably way too long. And then “paradox” sent me over the edge.

    Like

  5. Hattie October 23, 2012 at 19:20 #

    Too funny! Now I’m looking at everyday words and coming up with new definitions.

    Like

  6. Lisaman October 23, 2012 at 20:29 #

    Who thinks up this stuff..;-)

    Like

  7. SchmidleysScribbling October 23, 2012 at 20:43 #

    What a good exercise for thoses English language challenged. Dianne

    Like

  8. Three Well Beings October 25, 2012 at 06:08 #

    These are really good! Clever! I couldn’t even choose a favorite they were all so well done. 🙂

    Like

I welcome your comments but be warned: I'm menopausal and as likely to snarl as smile. Wine or Maltesers are an acceptable bribe; or a compliment about my youthful looks and cheery disposition will do in a pinch.

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