RIP PC Gareth Francis

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A policeman was murdered in Stockport last night.  PC Gareth Francis was on his way home from a night out with friends when he was attacked on Castle Street, Edgeley.  He died in hospital.  Two men have been arrested.

We shop on Castle Street all the time.  It is just up the road from my church.  I have been on it at night, on an evening out with friends.

I was desperate to leave South Africa in 1996 because of the violence.  We heard many terrible stories while we lived there, and witnessed violence ourselves, upon occasion.  I always thought it could happen to one of us while we lived there.

I never expected it to happen so close to home, here in the UK.  We have a lot of petty crime but we feel safe walking the streets.

It is dreadful to think of that young man, a man who was valuable in his community, who made a difference, being killed as he walked home.

Such a tragic waste.

 

O Is For My Scouse Accent

Another in my occasional series, The A to Z of The Laughing Housewife.

Orangensaft (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

O is for orange juice – I’ve been craving it lately. Not so nice for my bladder – drink too much orange juice and I’m like Julie Andrews in ‘The Sound of Music’: When the blog writes, when the pee stings…

The last time I drank this much orange juice was twenty-three years ago.  I was pregnant with Tory Boy and I must have needed the Vitamin C.  How embarrassing would that be for him, to have a sibling twenty-three years younger?  It would almost be worth it, just to see his face.

I’m pretty certain I won’t have that pleasure but, if I start craving cheese and tomato on crackers (my other craving), Tory Boy will stop speaking to me.

No, I have to face it – I am a woman of a certain age; it’s probably my ‘ormones. This is where my Scouse accent comes in, if you were wondering.  We Liverpudlians drop our aitches, extend words like ‘like’ to ‘lichhhh’ and talk about ‘me mum an’ me dad.’

Me Mum was my age now when she watched me get married.  I thought she was old then; now, I’m not so sure.  They say fifty is the new forty so if fifty is the new forty then forty is the new thirty and life begins at forty which must be thirty and at thirty I was raising babies.  When does my life begin?

O is also for ‘owl’ as in, ‘self-pitying ‘owl’.

Joke 668

Red Fish Tsukiji Fish Market Tokyo (Photo credit: hitthatswitch)

Here are some fish puns for you.  Really bad ones.  Please send me some jokes; I’m scraping the fish barrel here.

*

Where does seaweed look for a job?

In the ‘Kelp-wanted’ ads

What do you call a naked fish?

Bare-a-cuda

Why are fish smarter than humans?

Ever seen a fish spend a fortune trying to hook a person?

What was the name of Tom Sawyer’s fish?

Huckleberry Fin

What was the Romanovs’ favorite fish?

Tsardines

From photosbykev