Archive | 12:57

Feeling Bolshy Today

30 Jan
English: A sense of humour Someone has a sense...

English: A sense of humour Someone has a sense of humour leaving this for his family to read. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Set a timer for ten minutes. Open a new post. Start the timer, and start writing. When the timer goes off, publish. 

You know what?  I don’t think I will.  What ya gonna do about it WordPress? Huh?  Huh?

As if I would ever publish anythinggasp!  I can hardly bring myself to say it, never mind do it – unedited!

*

Write down the first words that comes to mind when we say . . .

. . . home.

. . . soil.

. . . rain.

Use those words in the title of your post.

Bolshy home/feeling soil/rain today.

Okay, not really – I got the title from the first prompt.

Let’s try again:

Hometalk (Mango Groove again)/soil your pants/rain fall.

This post’s new title: Talk: Your Pants Fall*

Smiling can imply a sense of humour and a stat...

Smiling can imply a sense of humour and a state of amusement, as in this painting of Falstaff by Eduard von Grützner. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Think about the last time you broke a rule (a big one, not just ripping the tags off your pillows). Were you burned, or did things turn out for the best?

…Thinks…thinks…No, thank goodness…yes…erm, oops…I’m a good girl, I am, I’ve never done anything I could go to jail for…I think…just how big a rule are we talking here, anyway?

*

Was there a special gift or toy you wanted as a child but never received? What was it?

Not that I can recall; my parents were pretty good at steering Father Christmas in the right direction.

I did go to visit my aunty one week after Christmas.  Her three girls got multiple Estée Lauder gift sets, which rather impressed me.  I’d have liked that sort of thing.

And yet, here I am: make-upless; perfumeless; must-remember-to-shower-todaylestmymanleavesme, but my husband of twenty-seven years still loves me.

Go figure.

*

Tell us about the role that faith plays in your life — or doesn’t.

I have faith that my husband will still love me even if I don’t wear make-up or shower today.

I have faith that my readers will mostly come back even if I write a not particularly funny post.

And I have faith in God, who gave me a sense of humour.  And a husband who doesn’t believe in Him.  I guess God has a sense of humour, too.

*

Write your obituary. 

She was incredibly beautiful, intelligent, slim and kind.  What she lacked in modesty, she made up in humour.

At the funeral, people from around the world who had mortgaged their homes to be there, sobbed at this great loss to blogkind.  The eulogy was three days long.

Her alleged killers, a group of WordPress prompters, currently on trial for Conspiracy to Deprive the Blogging World of its Greatest Humorist, Assault With a Deadly Computer Programme and for Just Having No Funny Bone to Speak Of, pleaded Innocent on the Grounds of She Was Driving Us Nuts With Her Incessant Fun-Poking at Our Carefully-Worded Prompts.

English: Graffiti tag plus a sense of humour D...

English: Graffiti tag plus a sense of humour Dull tag but nice sub-text. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

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If you had to choose between being able to write a blog (but not read others’) and being able to read others’ blogs (but not write your own), which would you pick? Why?

Well now you’re just being silly.

 

Joke 678

30 Jan
Escargot

Escargot (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

A couple were having a party at their house.  An hour before the party the woman found out that she still needed escargots, so she sent her husband out for them.

He was walking to the supermarket and he figured he had lots of time.  He stopped at a bar on the way.  An hour and a half later he looked at his watch and realized that the party must already have started.

He quickly ran to the market, bought the snails and ran home.  He tried to sneak into the kitchen without his wife seeing him, but at that moment she came out.

He quickly threw the snails on the floor and said, “Come on guys, we’re almost there.”

*

From ajokeaday.com

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