rendered universal joint animation. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
Motor Insurance Quotes from Claim Forms
1. I was on my way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident.
2. I knocked over a man. He admitted it was his fault as he had been run over before.
3. I collided with a stationary tramcar coming the other way.
4. I consider that neither vehicle was to blame but if either were to blame it was the other one.
5. I left my Austin Seven outside and when I came out later to my amazement there was an Austin Twelve.
6. Car had to turn sharper than was necessary owing to an invisible lorry.
7. To avoid a collision I ran into the other car.
8. The pedestrian had no idea which way to run, so I ran over him.
9. The other car collided with mine without giving any warning of its intention.
10. The other man altered his mind so I had to run into him.
11. I told the other idiot what he was and went on.
12. A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.
13. I unfortunately ran over a pedestrian and the old gentleman was taken to hospital, much regretting the circumstances.
14. I thought the side window was down but it was up, as I found when I put my head through it.
15. If the other driver had stopped a few yards behind himself the accident would not have happened.
16. She suddenly saw me, lost her head and we met.
17. Cow wandered into my car. I was afterwards informed that the cow was half-witted.
18. Three women were talking to each other and when two stepped back and one stepped forward I had to have an accident.
19. There were plenty of lookers-on but no witnesses.
20. A bull was standing near and a fly must have tickled him because he gored my car.
The Laughing Housewife 
Some interesting comments about the accidents…different than I hear around here.
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Reminds me of the time I had to go to the police station & report a pedestrian ran into my car, got up & ran off. It was true! I was at the end of a long line of traffic & going quite slowly when a jogger ran into the passenger side fender on my car, bounced back up & ran off. I tried chasing him down to make sure he was OK, but he ran into a back yard off a lane & I lost him. To make sure he didn’t later report me as a hit & run driver, I reported the accident to the police. But I certainly felt foolish saying a pedestrian ran into my car.
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Truth IS stranger than fiction. Most of them are caused by language inadequacy.
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These are so funny! I totally believe them to be accurate. i love #10!
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Here’s another I’ve heard: “I drove into a driveway that wasn’t mine and hit a tree I don’t have.”
It’s the sort of thing I would do. If the garage EVER GIVE ME MY CAR BACK *weeps*
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You do have to worry about some folk. 😉
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I loved these, especially the ones about the cows. They are like ours about cattle straying onto highways and people colliding with them. It’s always the cattle’s fault.
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you have such a way of holding me captive to your words. Great post!
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These are so funny. Our fellow humans don’t read and can’t write, as every former editor knows. Dianne
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So happy I’m not driving anymore … and haven’t done for 45 years … after a bad accident – one thing was for sure that somebody moved a telephone pole for me that December day. #7 – my favorite …. they all what we call human errors. *smile and I’m sure that some drivers has given those explanations.
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“cow was half-witted” – probably told that by another cow
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