Joke 767

29 Apr

Some smelly old jokes for you.

  • What sea creatures always win in a fight?   Mussels.
  • What fish goes up the river at 100mph?   A motor pike.
  • How do you communicate with a fish?   You drop it a line.
  • 1st kipper: ‘Smoking’s bad for you.’   2nd kipper: ‘It’s OK, I’ve been cured.’
  • What kind of fish is useful in freezing weather?   Skate.
  • Where are most fish found?   Between the head and the tail.
  • What do fish sing to each other?   Salmon Chanted ‘Evening’.
  • What do you get if you cross a trout with an apartment?   A flat fish.
  • What is purple, lives in the sea and weighs 5000 pounds?   Moby Plum.

Thanks to photosbykev for these jokes.

15 Responses to “Joke 767”

  1. jatwood4 April 29, 2013 at 05:25 #



  2. slpmartin April 29, 2013 at 05:33 #

    Really found the video so very cute…had to laugh about the name he gave the fish…and love the dad’s catch and release approach…smiles.


  3. viv blake April 29, 2013 at 07:31 #

    That little boy was so sweet. Why wasn’t the fish wriggling? I think it was dead.


  4. Grannymar April 29, 2013 at 08:33 #

    That little fishy looked a little stiffy, but the kid made me smile.


  5. benzeknees April 29, 2013 at 09:18 #

    I’m glad we don’t have smell-o-vision!


  6. Lisaman April 29, 2013 at 11:00 #

    Hahaha love the fishies name.. free!!


  7. Al April 29, 2013 at 14:38 #

    You must have been loaded to the gills when you wrote these.


  8. SchmidleysScribbling April 29, 2013 at 16:11 #

    HaHa I taught my boys to fish. And Connie (my daughter) too. Granddaughter Rita is learning how to fish (yes she looks like me when I was her age). The other day, Rita snagged her dog Bozo who had followed her to the lake and jumped in. Love the kid film. Dianne


  9. Hattie April 29, 2013 at 19:07 #

    Like these jokes, I too am creaking with age!


  10. Maddie Cochere April 30, 2013 at 04:20 #

    That little boy was so sweet. Good jokes; good video. 🙂


  11. viveka May 1, 2013 at 15:08 #

    Linda …. nice try *laughing


    • viveka May 1, 2013 at 15:11 #

      I missed that the boy … was on video. Love it …. he gave it the name FREE! that was 12 points to UK. Thanks for that one.


I welcome your comments but be warned: I'm menopausal and as likely to snarl as smile. Wine or Maltesers are an acceptable bribe; or a compliment about my youthful looks and cheery disposition will do in a pinch.

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