Joke 771

3 May
Amusing Sign

Amusing Sign (Photo credit: njhdiver)

Signs of the Times

  • In a nonsmoking area: If we see you smoking, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.
  • On a maternity room door: Push, Push, Push.
  • On a front door: Everyone on the premises is a vegetarian except the dog.
  • At an optometrist’s office: If you don’t see what you’re looking for, you’ve come to the right place.
  • On a taxidermist’s window: We really know our stuff.
  • On a butcher’s window: Let me meat your needs.
  • On a fence: Salesmen welcome. Dog food is expensive.
  • At a car dealership: The best way to get back on your feet — miss a car payment.

17 Responses to “Joke 771”

  1. Katherine Gordy Levine May 3, 2013 at 04:39 #

    Pinned you twice today, or was it once yesterday and another today. No matter here’s the latest won. You keep me emotionally fit.


  2. benzeknees May 3, 2013 at 07:50 #

    Hahahahaha! A Malteser for you!


  3. viveka May 3, 2013 at 07:56 #

    Thanks for the early smile …. good ones! I want to wish you a great weekend and I would love to pass this award on to you …. ‚ÄúI am part of the WordPress Family‚ÄĚ –


  4. viv blake May 3, 2013 at 08:05 #

    These are real crackers.


  5. colonialist May 3, 2013 at 10:27 #

    The gentle hint about the dog is a classic.


  6. sharechair May 3, 2013 at 14:21 #

    If my dog would eat salesmen… I’d get her a few. She is the pickiest eater on the planet. Turns her nose up at boiled chicken! ūüėĮ Do I remember that you have a Yorkie? Any suggestions for food my little diva might like?


    • The Laughing Housewife May 3, 2013 at 15:01 #

      Two Yorkies!

      The most expensive meat you can find…and you still have to beg them to take it ūüôā


      • sharechair May 4, 2013 at 00:51 #

        oh, yes. That describes the eating habits of my girl perfectly. I beg. I cook. I tease. I hand-feed. I tempt. Sigh. If you ever find something they like…. please share!!!


  7. slpmartin May 4, 2013 at 01:03 #

    Really liked the non-vegetarian sign…a good one to consider at my front gate. ūüôā


  8. Three Well Beings May 4, 2013 at 03:18 #

    These are very clever. I really liked the “non-smoking” reminder! ūüôā


  9. Judith Atwood May 4, 2013 at 08:11 #

    Another good set! You go!


  10. Grannymar May 5, 2013 at 17:06 #

    All good today.


  11. May 9, 2013 at 16:04 #

    That was funny!!!!!


I welcome your comments but be warned: I'm menopausal and as likely to snarl as smile. Wine or Maltesers are an acceptable bribe; or a compliment about my youthful looks and cheery disposition will do in a pinch.

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