Joke 771

3 May
Amusing Sign

Amusing Sign (Photo credit: njhdiver)

Signs of the Times

  • In a nonsmoking area: If we see you smoking, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.
  • On a maternity room door: Push, Push, Push.
  • On a front door: Everyone on the premises is a vegetarian except the dog.
  • At an optometrist’s office: If you don’t see what you’re looking for, you’ve come to the right place.
  • On a taxidermist’s window: We really know our stuff.
  • On a butcher’s window: Let me meat your needs.
  • On a fence: Salesmen welcome. Dog food is expensive.
  • At a car dealership: The best way to get back on your feet — miss a car payment.
Advertisements

17 Responses to “Joke 771”

  1. Katherine Gordy Levine May 3, 2013 at 04:39 #

    Pinned you twice today, or was it once yesterday and another today. No matter here’s the latest won. You keep me emotionally fit.

    Like

  2. benzeknees May 3, 2013 at 07:50 #

    Hahahahaha! A Malteser for you!

    Like

  3. viveka May 3, 2013 at 07:56 #

    Thanks for the early smile …. good ones! I want to wish you a great weekend and I would love to pass this award on to you …. ‚ÄúI am part of the WordPress Family‚ÄĚ – http://wp.me/p293Pw-6cY

    Like

  4. viv blake May 3, 2013 at 08:05 #

    These are real crackers.

    Like

  5. colonialist May 3, 2013 at 10:27 #

    The gentle hint about the dog is a classic.

    Like

  6. sharechair May 3, 2013 at 14:21 #

    If my dog would eat salesmen… I’d get her a few. She is the pickiest eater on the planet. Turns her nose up at boiled chicken! ūüėĮ Do I remember that you have a Yorkie? Any suggestions for food my little diva might like?

    Like

    • The Laughing Housewife May 3, 2013 at 15:01 #

      Two Yorkies!

      The most expensive meat you can find…and you still have to beg them to take it ūüôā

      Like

      • sharechair May 4, 2013 at 00:51 #

        oh, yes. That describes the eating habits of my girl perfectly. I beg. I cook. I tease. I hand-feed. I tempt. Sigh. If you ever find something they like…. please share!!!

        Like

  7. slpmartin May 4, 2013 at 01:03 #

    Really liked the non-vegetarian sign…a good one to consider at my front gate. ūüôā

    Like

  8. Three Well Beings May 4, 2013 at 03:18 #

    These are very clever. I really liked the “non-smoking” reminder! ūüôā

    Like

  9. Judith Atwood May 4, 2013 at 08:11 #

    Another good set! You go!

    Like

  10. Grannymar May 5, 2013 at 17:06 #

    All good today.

    Like

  11. vastlycurious.com May 9, 2013 at 16:04 #

    That was funny!!!!!

    Like

All comments are welcome, though compliments may result in you having your Malteser privileges revoked

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Nicola Hulme Author

Exploring creative writing and learning every day

Worldly Winds

It's not easy being me!

Vivinfrance's Blog

mainly poetry, also quilts, pictures, life-writing and the occasional short story.

Unpicked:Restitched

Where is the heart of Stockport?

Grains of Sand

notices and reflections in ministry

The Cvillean

The adventures of little read writing Hood

%d bloggers like this: