Joke 796

28 May
A dog looking through a fence

A dog looking through a fence (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Grannymar told me this story.  Imagine it in a beautiful Irish lilt:

I’m at Pets at Home buying a bag of food for my dog. While in the check-out queue, a woman behind me asked if I had a dog. Why else would I be buying dog food, RIGHT???

So on impulse I told her that no, I didn’t have a dog, I was starting the Dog Food Diet again, and that I probably shouldn’t because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I’d lost 50 pounds before I awakened in intensive care with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and all you do is load your pockets with food nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. 

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me.

I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff a poodle’s butt and a car hit me. 

 

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14 Responses to “Joke 796”

  1. vastlycurious.com May 28, 2013 at 05:03 #

    HAHAHAHAAAHAHAAAAA! I had dog food for dinner , with salt it was Beneficially good . Laughing 🙂 woof

    Like

  2. misswhiplash May 28, 2013 at 06:33 #

    you are incorrigable !! Hope I spelt that right..if not you know what I mean!

    Like

  3. benzeknees May 28, 2013 at 06:39 #

    Knee slapping funny!

    Like

  4. viv blake May 28, 2013 at 07:00 #

    I could somehow see Hub doing that! Some people just ask to have the micky taken.

    Like

  5. viveka May 28, 2013 at 09:03 #

    Linda … what a dogs life *smile

    Like

  6. mairedubhtx May 28, 2013 at 12:56 #

    Since I’m off to buy dog food this morning, this was especially appropriate for my day! I loved it!

    Like

  7. Janie Jones May 28, 2013 at 13:48 #

    I don’t know what’s funnier, the joke itself or that Grannymar actually told someone this as a “true” story. I wonder if the other shopper was gullible enough to believe it.

    Like

  8. Terry May 28, 2013 at 15:51 #

    I am still laughing over this!!!! good one!

    Like

  9. jatwood4 May 28, 2013 at 16:52 #

    Good one! 😎

    Like

  10. sheilamariegrimes May 28, 2013 at 19:47 #

    lol ……….you didn’t! ….so funny …my sides are hurting! no more!

    Like

  11. Grannymar May 28, 2013 at 20:52 #

    Glad it worked for you!

    PS: I have a new home as of today so you can find me here: http://grannymar.wordpress.com/ alas the gravatar still leads to the old blog. I need to learn how to change it, Pronto!

    Like

  12. slpmartin May 28, 2013 at 22:22 #

    Very cute.

    Like

  13. Hattie May 31, 2013 at 18:44 #

    That gets an LOL out of me!

    Like

I welcome your comments but be warned: I'm menopausal and as likely to snarl as smile. Wine or Maltesers are an acceptable bribe; or a compliment about my youthful looks and cheery disposition will do in a pinch.

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