I’m going to confess up front that I don’t know enough about grammar to understand all of these jokes; but I know some of my readers do, so their four ewe.
- Three intransitive verbs walk into a bar. They sit. They drink. They leave.
- A comma splice walks into a bar, it has a drink and then leaves.
- A dangling modifier walks into a bar. After finishing a drink, the bartender asks it to leave.
- A Question mark walks into a bar?
- Two Quotation marks “walk into” a bar.
- A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar, drinking a drink.
- The bar was walked into by the passive voice.
- The past, the present, and the future walked into a bar. It was tense.
- A synonym ambles into a pub.
- A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar, drinking to drink.
- A hyperbole totally ripped into this bar and destroyed everything.
- A run on sentence walks into a bar it is thirsty.
- Falling slowly, softly falling, the chiasmus collapsed to the bar floor.
- A group of homophones wok inn two a bar.
UPDATE:
Al left this clever one in the comments:
- An antonym walks out of a bar.
The Laughing Housewife 
I feel safer now : )
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i am going to admit that as an SLP, I mostly help kids with the basic grammar, so I don’t understand them all, either.
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Ms. Tilly Bud, these are great! Thanks 😎
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Got them, just hope I don’t use them to make up more all night…. Lol.
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I wish I’d seen this when I was teaching grammar – hilarious!
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those were really interesting. I enjoyed them
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These are clever…and the ones I do understand, are really fun! I would love to know all the rules of grammar, but I think I’ve forgotten nearly all of them! 🙂
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Hmm…I thought these were quite clever…oh no…my age is showing.
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That synonym was a metaphor! Love ’em.
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Well I had no idea what “chiasmus” meant. So I had to Google it. I got this:
In rhetoric, a verbal pattern (a type of antithesis) in which the second half of an expression is balanced against the first with the parts reversed. Essentially the same as antimetabole.
Needless to say I still have no idea! 🙂
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You forgot one. “An antonym walks out of a bar.”
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Clever! 😀
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In fact, it is too good not to share: I have updated the post.
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These were some of my very favorites!
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Antonymns, Homonymns and Synonyms will never understand each other and don’t drink together anymore. Dianne (who love run-on sentences and does not believe in split infinitives any more.)
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😀 😀
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A split infinitive walks into a bar, drinks too much and is arrested for double parking.
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😀
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Better? To drunkenly walk out of a bar to quickly and to efficiently be arrested for double parking, was not the split infinitive’s idea of a lovely night on the town.
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weird …lol
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Linda, so what chance I will have …. if you can’t understand them ????? But I like the post just because of that. *smile
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Brilliant selection today Budwiser. I feel I shall return here in future for grammatical inspiration. Very good.
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I love my new nickname!
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Reserved for special occasions 😉
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I must confess, I didn’t get many of them myself, but the ones I did were hilarious. If you like grammar jokes, here’s a website you should check out, only I don’t know how to make it a link in your comments section:
http://theoatmeal.com/tag/grammar
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Thanks 🙂
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Well, look at that! It added the link automatically. Spiffy cool.
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Love that last one. 🙂
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