Joke 829

30 Jun
the singer

the singer (Photo credit: Yossari)

For the sake of balance, here are more jokes from suite101, this time about sopranos.  They seem pretty cruel to me, but what do I know? I’m a baritone.

 

What’s the difference between a soprano and a piranha?

  • The lipstick.

What’s the difference between a soprano and a pit bull?

  • The jewellery.

What’s the difference between a Wagnerian soprano and the average American football offensive lineman?

  • Stage makeup.

What’s the difference between a Wagnerian soprano and a Wagnerian tenor?

  • About 10 pounds.

How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

  • One. She holds the bulb and the world revolves around her.
  • Two. One to hold the diet soda and the other to get her accompanist to do it.
  • Three. One to do it, her understudy, and one to say she could have done it better.
  • Four. One to change the bulb and three to pull the chair out from under her.

What’s the first thing a soprano does in the morning?

  • Puts on her clothes and goes home.

How is a soubrette different from a sewer rat?

  • Some people actually like sewer rats.

What is the difference between a soubrette and a cobra?

  • One is deadly poisonous, and the other is a reptile.

Why are soprano jokes all one-liners?

  • So tenors can understand them.

 

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12 Responses to “Joke 829”

  1. siggiofmaine June 30, 2013 at 04:12 #

    You are so so bad (good bad)…I love it. Laughs just when I needed them most.
    Peace
    Siggi

    Like

  2. slpmartin June 30, 2013 at 04:33 #

    These are very witty.

    Like

  3. sharechair June 30, 2013 at 10:56 #

    Sounds like the light bulb changer is quite a diva! 🙂

    Like

  4. viveka June 30, 2013 at 11:26 #

    Excellent …. I love divas.

    Like

  5. Al June 30, 2013 at 12:23 #

    You’ve hit the high note with these.

    Like

  6. Grannymar June 30, 2013 at 13:11 #

    Soprano’s create pictures for ears.

    Like

  7. mairedubhtx June 30, 2013 at 13:55 #

    Lovely

    Like

  8. SchmidleysScribbling June 30, 2013 at 17:38 #

    Ha Ha. Supranos do indeed have a high opinion of themselves. My mom, the choir director, organist, and an alto, had a terrible time with them. Dianne

    Like

  9. adinparadise June 30, 2013 at 19:16 #

    Lovely smiles to you, Tilly. 🙂

    Like

  10. Colonialist June 30, 2013 at 21:03 #

    And I thought this sort of vilification was reserved for piccolo players! 🙂

    Like

I welcome your comments but be warned: I'm menopausal and as likely to snarl as smile. Wine or Maltesers are an acceptable bribe; or a compliment about my youthful looks and cheery disposition will do in a pinch.

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