Teacher: True or False? The Declaration of Independence was written in Philadelphia.
Student: False. It was written in ink.
Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?
On the bottom.
Why did the British soldiers wear red coats?
So they could hide in the tomatoes.
Why did Paul Revere ride from Boston to Lexington?
Because the horse was too heavy to carry.
What was General Washington’s favorite tree?
What happened as a result of the Stamp Act?
The Americans licked the British.
[It hurt to post that one]
What kind of tea did the American colonists thirst for?
What did King George think of the American colonists?
He thought they were revolting.
Where did the colonists’ dogs protest against England?
At the Boston Flea Party.
What do you call an American revolutionary who draws cartoons?
Father William, the old priest, made it a practice to visit the parish school one day a week. He walked into the 4th grade class, where the children were studying the states, and asked them how many states they could name. They came up with about 40 names.
Father William jokingly told them that in his day students knew the names of all the states. One lad raised his hand and said, Yes sir, but in those days there were only 13 states.
Happy Fourth of July to my American