Joke 863

3 Aug
Funny fortune cookie

Funny fortune cookie (Photo credit: dougbelshaw)

An elderly man lay dying in his bed. While suffering the agonies of impending death, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favourite Italian anisette sprinkle cookies wafting up the stairs.  Gathering his remaining strength, he lifted himself from the bed.

Leaning against the wall, he slowly made his way out of the bedroom and with great effort, gripping the railing with both hands, he crawled downstairs. With laboured breath he leaned against the door frame, gazing into the kitchen. Were it not for death’s agony, he would have thought himself already in heaven, for there, spread out upon waxed paper on the kitchen table were literally hundreds of his favourite anisette sprinkled cookies.

Was it heaven? Or was it one final act of heroic love from his devoted wife of sixty years, seeing to it that he left this world a happy man?

Mustering one final effort, he threw himself towards the table, landing on his knees in a crumpled posture. His parched lips parted, the wondrous taste of the cookie was already in his mouth, seemingly bringing him back to life.

The aged and withered hand trembled on its way to a cookie at the edge of the table, when it was suddenly smacked with a spatula by his wife…

“Back off!” she said.  “They’re for the funeral.”


From Will & Guy


17 Responses to “Joke 863”

  1. Terry August 3, 2013 at 04:03 #

    oh my gosh!!!! too funny!!


  2. Naia August 3, 2013 at 04:08 #

    Outstanding! !!!!


  3. slpmartin August 3, 2013 at 04:25 #

    That was just wicked…but oh so funny!


  4. Musings August 3, 2013 at 05:11 #

    Yowch! It’s painful to laugh.


  5. Katharine Trauger August 3, 2013 at 05:25 #

    Ha–you got me that time! 😀


  6. siggiofmaine August 3, 2013 at 05:49 #

    SIGH. ☺


  7. adollyciousirony August 3, 2013 at 06:35 #

    LOL :mrgreen:


  8. Grannymar August 3, 2013 at 10:30 #

    Great punch line!


  9. Al August 3, 2013 at 12:33 #

    I guess those cookies were to die for.


  10. mairedubhtx August 3, 2013 at 14:19 #

    This was funny!


  11. letstalkaboutfamily August 3, 2013 at 18:11 #

    Heard this from an Italian group long time ago. Still love it. I felt you had to be Italian to really get it.


  12. bluebee August 4, 2013 at 01:06 #



  13. David J. Bauman August 4, 2013 at 01:10 #

    As George T. would say, “Oh MY!”


  14. lanceleuven August 4, 2013 at 14:41 #

    That was excellent! 😀


  15. Karen Snyder August 4, 2013 at 20:21 #

    😀 Too, too funny! You are as sick and twisted as I! 😀


I welcome your comments but be warned: I'm menopausal and as likely to snarl as smile. Wine or Maltesers are an acceptable bribe; or a compliment about my youthful looks and cheery disposition will do in a pinch.

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