Joke 869

9 Aug

Today’s jokes are in honour of where I am today.

Cartoon from Savage Chickens

William Shakespeare walks into a pub and the barman says, “Oi, Get out of here, you’re Bard!”

*

Said Hamlet to Ophelia, 
“I’ll do a sketch of thee.
What kind of pencil shall I use?
2B, or not 2B?”

*

What’s the difference between William Shakespeare and Walt Disney?

Shakespeare writes and Walt Disney.

(Try it in a Scottish accent)

*

From Yahoo

 

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8 Responses to “Joke 869”

  1. Katharine Trauger August 9, 2013 at 05:31 #

    We just finished watching Taylor and Burton in Taming of the Shrew. Hilarious stuff. Shared it with one of those professionally bored teens and he liked it, too. Classic guy, W.S., wasn’t he!

    Like

    • Katharine Trauger August 9, 2013 at 05:32 #

      Oh, I meant to include, watched it for the fourth time. Love the last scene the most.

      Like

  2. slpmartin August 9, 2013 at 06:26 #

    As the old Laugh In character used to say “Very Interesting!”.

    Like

  3. sharechair August 9, 2013 at 14:07 #

    I made my husband say that punchline in a Scottish accent (he loves to play with accents) … but no matter how hard he tried, I still don’t get that joke. However, I laughed pretty hard at the Scottish accent-tries. 🙂

    Like

    • colonialist August 10, 2013 at 00:15 #

      *helpfully* A Scot would say ‘Diz nae’ for ‘does not’. They’rrre funny like tha’.

      Like

  4. colonialist August 10, 2013 at 00:20 #

    Love the Hamlet one!
    Director: ‘I want Ophelia!’
    Young extra: ‘Wait until we find somewhere more private!’

    Like

  5. benzeknees August 12, 2013 at 21:35 #

    Took me a couple tries, but finally got the Walt Disney one!

    Like

I welcome your comments but be warned: I'm menopausal and as likely to snarl as smile. Wine or Maltesers are an acceptable bribe; or a compliment about my youthful looks and cheery disposition will do in a pinch.

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