Joke 878

18 Aug
20120106 - Clint with Nic Cage hair - 1849-1852

20120106 – Clint with Nic Cage hair – 1849-1852 (Photo credit: Rev. Xanatos Satanicos Bombasticos (ClintJCL))

A man was getting a haircut prior to a trip to Rome.  He mentioned the trip to the barber who responded, “Rome?  Why would anyone want to go there?  It’s crowded and dirty and full of Italians.  You’re crazy to go to Rome.  So, how are you getting there?”

“We’re taking TWA,” was the reply.  “We got a great rate!”

“TWA?” exclaimed the barber.  “That’s a terrible airline. Their planes are old, their flight attendants are ugly, and they’re always late.  So, where are you staying in Rome?”

“We’ll be at the downtown International Marriott.”

“That dump!  That’s the worst hotel in the city. The rooms are small, the service is surly and they’re overpriced. So, whatcha doing when you get there?”

“We’re going to go to see the Vatican and we hope to see the Pope.”

“That’s rich,” laughed the barber.  “You and a million other people trying to see him. He’ll look the size of an ant.  Boy, good luck on this lousy trip of yours.  You’re going to need it.”

A month later, the man again came in for his regular haircut. The barber asked him about his trip to Rome.

“It was wonderful,”  explained the man, “not only were we on time in one of TWA’s brand new planes, but it was overbooked and they bumped us up to first class.  The food and wine were wonderful, and I had a beautiful 28 year old stewardess who waited on me hand and foot.  And the hotel was great!  They’d just finished a $25 million remodelling

job and now it’s the finest hotel in the city. They, too, were overbooked, so they apologized and gave us the presidential suite at no extra charge!”

“Well,” muttered the barber, “I know you didn’t get to see the pope.”

“Actually, we were quite lucky, for as we toured the Vatican, a Swiss Guard tapped me on the shoulder and explained that the pope likes to personally meet some of the visitors, and if I’d be so kind as to step into his private room and wait the pope would personally greet me. Sure enough, five minutes later the pope walked through the door and shook my hand! I knelt down as he spoke a few words to me.”

“Really?” asked the Barber.  “What’d he say?”

He said, “Where’d you get the lousy haircut?”

*

From Ahajokes.

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6 Responses to “Joke 878”

  1. Katharine Trauger August 18, 2013 at 04:05 #

    Perfect! 😉

    Like

  2. sharechair August 18, 2013 at 14:56 #

    ba-da-bing!

    Like

  3. SchmidleysScribbling August 18, 2013 at 17:58 #

    Too funny. That tapping you on the shoulder and taking you on a special tour thing really happens. When we visited Salisbury Cathedral late in the day, a brother took us on a tour of the interior of the church after hours. It was dark and surreal with candles flickering here and there. It was as if I had stepped back to 1500 or so.

    Also when Richard (son) and his wife Wendy visited the White House during the Bush years, a Secret Service man tapped him on the shoulder and escorted R & W into the rose garden to hear Bush and the President of Spain address the gathered group. Both of my kids R & W look Spanish (coincidently they had just returned from a tour of duty in Spain and were very tan). They think this is why they were selected for the honor. Dianne

    Like

  4. colonialist August 18, 2013 at 19:58 #

    He was a black sheep among barbers.

    Like

  5. lanceleuven August 19, 2013 at 14:04 #

    That was brilliant! 🙂

    Like

  6. slpmartin August 20, 2013 at 00:22 #

    Oh…that one was pure delight!

    Like

I welcome your comments but be warned: I'm menopausal and as likely to snarl as smile. Wine or Maltesers are an acceptable bribe; or a compliment about my youthful looks and cheery disposition will do in a pinch.

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