Joke 934

13 Oct

A lady was mailing an old family Bible to her brother in another part of the country.

Funny Church Signs

Funny Church Signs (Photo credit: au_tiger01)

“Is there anything breakable in here?” asked the postal clerk.
“Only the Ten Commandments,” answered the lady.

***

Somebody has said there are only two kinds of people in the world.

Those who wake up in the morning and say, “Good morning, Lord,” and those who wake up in the morning and say, “Good Lord, it’s morning.”
***
While driving in Pennsylvania, a family caught up to an Amish carriage.  The owner of the carriage obviously had a sense of humour, because attached to the back of the carriage was a hand printed sign:
“Energy efficient vehicle: Runs on oats and grass. Caution: Do not step in exhaust.”
***
A minister waited in line to have his car filled with gas just before a long holiday weekend.  The attendant worked quickly, but there were many cars ahead of him.  Finally, the attendant motioned him toward a vacant pump.
“Reverend,” said the young man, “I’m so sorry about the delay. It seems as if everyone waits until the last minute to get ready for a long trip.”
The minister chuckled, “I know what you mean. It’s the same in my business.”

***

People want the front of the bus, the back of the church, and the centre of attention.

*

From amazingjokes.com

Apologies for the formatting.  I can’t fix it and, hey, it’s Sunday…I’m not even going to try.

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8 Responses to “Joke 934”

  1. slpmartin October 13, 2013 at 05:28 #

    Just love that last one…though they were all good.

    Like

  2. http://vivinfrance.wordpress.com October 13, 2013 at 10:47 #

    Blasted formatting – I’ve reverted to using Windows Live Writer, and it works find. Just don’t EVER try to edit the post – when you re-publish it goes all haywire again.
    Love the jokes.

    Like

  3. Grannymar October 13, 2013 at 12:25 #

    I’m sending that Amish carriage joke to a friend who will enjoy it. He lives in Mennonite country!

    Like

  4. kateshrewsday October 13, 2013 at 15:12 #

    Some lovely ones today 🙂 I’m so often a Good Lord, Morning sort of person: I must endeavour to be more of a Good Morning Lord sort.
    Thank, as always, Tilly 🙂

    Like

  5. SchmidleysScribbling October 13, 2013 at 21:23 #

    I don’t think anyone with such an untenable position could possibly exist.

    Like

  6. colonialist October 13, 2013 at 21:37 #

    Another good batch, well-served!

    Like

  7. bluebee October 15, 2013 at 10:46 #

    I guess I don’t exist *poof*

    Like

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Nicola Hulme Author

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