Joke 941

From the top fifty jokes of all time (until the next top fifty list is compiled)

Little Shriner and member of the Tommy Cooper Society (Photo credit: Kathleen Tyler Conklin)

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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week.  I phoned her up to arrange a date but unfortunately she’d popped her clogs.

Peter Kay

Police arrested two kids yesterday.  One was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.

They charged one and let the other one off.

Tommy Cooper

I went to a restaurant that serves ‘breakfast at any time’.  So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.

Anonymous

Why do men get married?

So they don’t have to hold in their stomachs any more.

Anonymous

Where there’s a will – there’s a relative.

Ricky Gervais

I had a ploughman’s lunch the other day. He wasn’t very happy.

Tommy Cooper

To the man on crutches, dressed in camouflage, who stole my wallet…you can hide but you can’t run.

Milton Jones