From the top fifty jokes of all time (until the next top fifty list is compiled)
I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week. I phoned her up to arrange a date but unfortunately she’d popped her clogs.
Police arrested two kids yesterday. One was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.
They charged one and let the other one off.
I went to a restaurant that serves ‘breakfast at any time’. So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.
Why do men get married?
So they don’t have to hold in their stomachs any more.
Where there’s a will – there’s a relative.
I had a ploughman’s lunch the other day. He wasn’t very happy.
To the man on crutches, dressed in camouflage, who stole my wallet…you can hide but you can’t run.