Tag Archives: Housewife

No Smoking Unless You Are On Fire

2 Aug
Teeth

Image by howzey via Flickr

Time for some more searches that found this blog.

Sound Advice

  • no smoking unless you are on fire
  • life is short smile while you still have teeth

For Those Between Bloggers

  • mezzanine levels blogs

People Often Come Here Looking For A Hard-Working Housewife Blog; How Disappointed They Must Be

  • pain stripping housewife
  • housewife tickle
  • a housewifes job are newer done…
  • my name is i am a housewife
  • how to look like a hard worker
  • housewife superhero 

The Search For Tooth

  • big dogs with cheesy smiles
  • good teeth smile
  • homeless people teeth
  • ugly person smiling
  • tooth bathroom

Ewwwww

  • brown stripe on root of wisdom teeth
  • granies sex
  • pet poo cartoon
  • cartoon fart fog

Sigh.  I Totally Get This

  • my hubby thinks im ugly poem
  • ugly wife blog
  • flaky mother

I Totally Don’t Get This

  • ugliest yorkshire terrier
  • gay socks eating
  • temporary poem
  • gay socks and fun
  • sick clocks
  • yoda police
  • womanless rotary
  • frog facebook

Why So Particular?

  • cfs/me in kusadasi

Demonstrating The Value Of Knowing Where The Commas Go

  • old fashioned house,wife rules

Demonstrating The Value Of Using The Correct Tense (And Complete Sentences)

  • cartoons give birth

Should I Be Worried?

  • noah ark 2011
  • free porn tube
  • knickerless women in the street
  • poem for a knickerless lady
  • gave my wife to another man

Massive Legs Woman And The Elderly Teeth

12 Apr
Using Internet Explorer, I made a close up of ...

Image via Wikipedia

It’s that time again: searches that found me.  If you can make sense of any of them, I’d be grateful to know what.

 

Body Dysmorphia?

  • Massive Legs Woman
  • please give me a full pic.of somebodys legs
  • smiling man with busted teeth
  • tooth cry
  • mashed up teeth smiles
  • smily faces of people who do not have a teeth
  • elderly teeth

That Is So Not A Good Idea

  • green beans with nik naks

Things We Don’t Care About

  • ralphhasawifey

 Again With The Finding Their Way To My Blog For Reasons I Can’t Fathom

  • kill husband cartoon

No Kidding

  • my family lo0k at me strangely if i randomly start laughing at the mobile:)

 

I Don’t Write Poetry On This Blog No More

  • poems for removing guests removing shoes

Huh?

  • fish contraception cartoon
  • polifolia choirs
  • funny barrier contraception cartoons 

How Would I Know?

  • is freda funny?
  • is shower power safe on granite

 Could This Be True?

  • tomato purée stops bulimia
  • ugly women gay sex

 That’s Not Much Of A Prize

  • psychic sees lottery win cartoons

 Let’s Not

  • let’s gonna last 

Why Being A Housewife May Not Be A Good Thing

  • housewife forced to sit ups
  • leather house wife
  • fact about kettles
  • laughing washing machine

What Did She Do To That Donkey?

  • you’re only as old ass the woman you fell

A Beer-Guzzling Mammal Of The Nocturnal Kind

pic of bud sucking bat of africa

And This One Is Seriously Scary

cut open the “pregnant women” “brick testament”

The Laughing Housewife Is Decorated For Services To Housework

21 Mar
Dried green paint

Image via Wikipedia

I’m sorry: my fingers misread my thoughts.  That should read: The Laughing Housewife Is Decorating As Part Of Her Indentured Servitude.

The house was re-wired fourteen months ago.  I need to paint the ceilings, particularly around the light fixtures.  You might think it has taken me a long time to get to it but you have to factor in:

  1. I walk the dogs a lot.
  2. In that time I have painted and/or papered the lounge, downstairs hall, upstairs hall, Tory Boy bedroom, downstairs toilet, one side of the bannister.
  3. I play computer games a lot.
  4. I couldn’t do anything while the kitchen and bathroom were refurbished.
  5. I spend all day writing blogs, reading blogs, writing comments on blogs, reading comments on blogs, replying to comments on blogs.
  6. In Tilly Bud Time, fourteen months is nothing: it took me six years to finish decorating the hall, by which time I had to re-paint the woodwork and the paper was two different shades because the stuff that had gone up first had faded to a dirty hand print colour.

I only have to paint two ceilings, so an afternoon should do it.  By which I mean it will take at least a week.  There’s the shifting, the carting, the cleaning, the dusting, the wall prep, the equipment to dig out of the loft, the sheets to cover everything, the arguing with the Hub because I’m exhausted and in a bad mood, the long bath to soak away aches and pains and plan his assassination, the cleaning up once I’m done, the long bath because I should have cleaned up before I took the first long bath and now I’m dirty again from cleaning, and the lying on the couch in the recovery position while my grateful family bring me cups of Earl Grey tea and apologies because they forgot to buy me a thank you box of Maltesers.

I’m telling you all this not to show how industrious I am, which I am, but to apologise in advance if I don’t comment on your blog or reply to comments on mine for the next few days.  I planned to start the decorating today and I’m already a day behind because I’m going out tonight and I can’t paint, cook and weep at an amateur production of Hamlet all in one day.  I’ll start tomorrow.  Or Wednesday.

Free Poems

11 Feb

A lot of people come to my blog looking for a funny poem, particularly if there is a knickerless housewife or Cheryl Cole involved; I feel bad that I can’t oblige.  However, I came across this website today and it has all kinds of poems, funny and not, so I thought I would re-direct you: http://famouspoetsandpoems.com/

By the way, please, one of you: leave a comment telling me why you need a housewife poem.

 

UPDATE Tuesday 16.3.2010

I’m BEGGING you: tell me why you need a housewife poem – not a knickerless housewife poem; I think I can work that one out for myself: an ordinary housewife poem. I get so many views from Google searches that my curiousity is piqued.  I have steered you in the direction of a possible source, so I think it’s the least you can do.

 Thank you for stopping by.

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