The Royal Welding

So it’s all over bar the shouting at Prince Harry.  It was a lovely ceremony. Boring, as weddings always are except for the bride, but lovely.

Princess William of Wales looked fabulous in her gorgeous dress.  If I was getting married again (not unlikely as I will soon be a widow, the Hub having walked into the room half way through and complained, ‘Is this *&$£ still on?’), I would be one of those sad women who copy celebrity dresses.

The world and his wife (wonder whose dress idea she stole?) will be blogging about how much they loved/hated the event, so I will instead bring you some interesting facts gleaned from the talking heads who had to fill in the time between first guest arriving at the Abbey (08:15) and last (HMtheQ, 10:50):

• William is already a prince of Wales (not thePrince of Wales), but the Queen gave him the gift of being his own little United Kingdom: the couple are now known as the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge (England) (a Royal Duke being way up the scale from a regular duke), Earl and Countess of Strathearn (Scotland), Baron and Baroness of Carrickfergus (Northern Ireland)
• There were 36 Philip Treacy hats on display, or 36 abominations that bring shame on the name ‘milliner’ (the talking heads didn’t say that, they gushed; I edited a little to reflect my disgust that perfectly good material and feathers should be so shamefully abused) 

• Elton John and David Furnish were the first civil partnership to attend a royal wedding though not, one suspects, the first gay couple
• David Beckham wore his OBE on the wrong lapel (right instead of left) and his missus showed bad form by wearing black
• I wore a soft grey faux wool overtop and a blue cotton t-shirt patterned with unique bleach stains over black boot cut pants with 2% elastane for easy movement from the couch to the tv remote, and pale blue Woolworths stokies.  My hair was dressed au naturel in a becoming greasy unwashed colour
• The Prince’s parents’ wedding was thirty years ago in the middle of a recession; there was unrest in the Middle East and Bruce Forsythe headlined Saturday night tv.  The more things change…
• The police wore dress uniform, hence the Mickey Mouse gloves
• Wills was made one thousandth Knight of the Garter in 2008, a gift in the monarch’s possession.  All KotGs were invited to the wedding.  Never mind, Mr Blair and Mr Brown
• They add rust to the cement to make the Mall road red
• A soldier held the car door open for the Queen at the Abbey.  She looked like a little old lady with an ignorant taxi driver as she tried to tell him she was getting out on the other side
• Another old lady travelled thousands of miles from foreign parts and slept on the street by the Abbey for four days to make sure she had a good spot to see everything.  Wills arrived and she fainted, was stretchered away and missed Kate arriving and the whole ceremony she had so longed to see…ouch
• The award for Most Inane Remark By A Talking Head goes to Sky’s Charlotte Hawkins for this as William arrived at the Abbey: One half of the couple is here; now all we need is the bride.
• A horse called Royal Wedding won the 5:30 at Fontwell
• To celebrate the whole thing going off well, a Westminster Abbey verger cartwheeled down the aisle:

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