Things are winding down before they gear up again. Most of the Christmas shopping is done. Half of the Christmas cleaning is done. The bulk of the wrapping so far is done. I’m waiting to do my fresh bits shop at the weekend and for my two house guests to arrive on Sunday; then the fever starts in earnest on Christmas Eve.
Friends came to my house last night, banished the menfolk to the bedrooms, ate pizza and crisps, drank a lot of wine and ogled various male actors in Love Actually. One likes Karl (so pretty, we never got beyond his character’s name); another likes Alan Rickman (go figure); the third tussled with me for Colin Firth until she spotted Liam Neeson. I took Hugh Grant as a bonus. None of us had drunk enough to ask for Bill Nighy.
I had a good time but my head is banging this morning. Not from alcohol – I’m such a lightweight, I get drunk just on the excitement of being in the same room as other people who are drinking. One glass of wine and I’m hogging the karaoke machine; two, and I’m fast asleep in a corner.
It was the late night and not enough sleep that had me fighting Spud for the paracetamol before he left for school: he also had a late night; he waited up to eat the leftovers. I suspect that Toby also ate leftovers on the sly – he came downstairs this morning to throw up by the back door and went back to bed without asking for his breakfast. As he is a dog who hassles Spud to get a move on in the mornings because he knows he will be fed as soon as Spud has left, I was all for calling an ambulance.
The banging has been interspersed with intermittent ringing. Tory Boy phoned for a chat. Ninety minutes later, he fobbed me and my sweaty ear off because he was on his way out to try to find a greasy spoon serving a full English breakfast. He lives darn sarf; he didn’t hold out much hope. Southerners just don’t do greasy little cafés full of germs and tasty sausages like we northerners.
I had just come off the phone when my friend called to tell me she found her lost keys. Her husband dropped her off here last night and the Hub took her home because her husband was on an early shift. Pity she had to wake him up to let her in. Her keys were in his car. Then my brother phoned to talk about THIS SECTION HAS BEEN CENSORED DUE TO THE DELICATE NATURE OF CHRISTMAS PRESENT EXCHANGES.
I spent the morning watching a bit of Johnny Lee Miller in Elementary and then trawled through old posts to find something of interest to tell you. I’ve got nothing. December 2009 it was all snow. December 2010 it was all snow and the worst head cold I’ve ever had. December 2011 it was all the worst head cold I’ve ever had. I know September 2012 I wrote about the worst head cold I’ve ever had. Either the germs are mutating each year to attack me with more virulence, or I’m a bit of a drama queen.
When I’ve lain down on my chaise longue for a while in my flowing robe, and rested with lavender cloths over my eyes, we’ll talk about it.
We are twin souls in our incapacity for alcohol (try saying that after two drinks), and in our liking for Love Actually.
PS We love you for being a drama queen.
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I am utterly and most heartfeltedly grateful to know that, dear one 😀
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Tilly I think you should write a melodrama – you are very good at it. You could probably write it in one sitting with a bottle of champagne – heaha!
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Hmm… 🙂
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ha! i just repondede to your other post with an mmm!
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Hmm?
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well this post surely started my morning off well. I’ve already watched Love Actually twice this year. And now that it is on Netflix “the boys” can come along with me wherever I go. (yes, there’s an app for that.)
And I definitely agree with the mutated annual virus: I got 2 girls down and out here. 5 days before Christmas. lovely. actually – not.
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What a bore for poor Rorybore 😦
Hope they all feel better soon. At least they’re getting it out of the way for Christmas.
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What a pleasant read to have with my morning coffee…it sweetens the entire day.
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Aw, shucks! You made me smile, Charlie 😀
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The lavender cloths will do the trick. For someone who is a lightweight and suffering from a headache, this was a very entertaining post. 🙂 I love your melodrama so don’t ever be shy!
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I don’t drink much at parties, I play with the glass and get high on the fun of having everyone to chat to.
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Ha. You made me chuckle. Not bad at 6:25 in the morning. We are gearing up for a party at our home on Christmas. My sisters and their families will be here, all looking forward to the grab bag game. I am going to insert a $100 bill in one of the bags. First time, ever.
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What a lovely idea! Will you tell them beforehand or just let it be a great surprise?
I don’t know this game; how is it played?
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Here’s another ‘joke’ for your Malteser competition: Santa’s elves think that all the work they do getting the toys ready for Christmas, is just like a day at the office. They do all the work, but the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit. Not only that, but anytime he wants to, Santa could give them the sack. 😆
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Dear Adinparadise,
Thank you for your submission.
Unfortunately, whilst we here in The Laughing Housewife office were tickled pink by your joke, you are twelve months late entering the competition, which ran in 2011.
As compensation, we will name a Malteser after you, just before we eat it.
Yours in hilarity,
TLH Editorial Team 😀
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What a bummer! I don’t want to be eaten. 😯
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😀 😀 😀
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heh, finally someone i’m a heavier drinker than. (that sentence’s syntax seems wrong but not sure how to untangle it.) Love your censored presents bit. You’re far ahead of the game. I have half the Christmas shopping still to do and none of it wrapped. But that’s what tomorrow was built for, right?
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Absolutely. If we’re still here, that is 🙂
Maybe you were the smart one…
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sounds like a wonderful evening
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It was! 😀
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Agree on the men (although you can keep HG), but when it comes to dancing, Bill Nighy would win every time.
PS – when will your book be available?
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Which one? The SA poems one is complete and will be submitted to publishers in January; the poo poems one will be self-published in January.
So, um, January, sometime or never is my answer to your question 🙂
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The older I get, the better Colin Firth looks. So, what’s wrong with Bill Nighy? He is a fine actor. Just caught him again in Reilly Ace of Spies, and who can forget his portrayal of Davy Jones in the Pirates films. Geeez.
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Nothing is wrong with Bill Nighy, if louche, weathered and disreputable is your bag 😉
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Sadly I’m a drinker, or I’m a sad drinker. Not sure which is more appropriate. Haven’t quite reached that lull in our house yet. Working on it!
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Go, girl! You can do it!
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Wonderful to find out that you’re human *smile … by the way you can send Colin my way .. and also Rick too.
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I’ve been darn sarf a few times, Tilly, and don’t think I’ve ever seen a greasy spoon. They must have them… they must hide them.
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They used to have them when I was a girl then Delia and Jamie et al got on the case and cleaned up Southerners’ food.
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Shocking!
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Ah, well that explains it! Thanks, Viv! 😀
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I love Bill Nighy because I find him funny and he was excellent in Pirates of the Caribbean. Colin Firth and Alan Rickman on the other hand are so sexy!
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AR – I’m sorry, I just don’t see it 😦
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Ha. I was going to comment from my inbox, until I saw you’d posted a pic of CF. Nice shot. Thanks! 😉
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Unfortunately, as we age our immune systems aren’t what they used to be so our colds seem worse. I get the flu jab every year & it does seem to help lessen the severity of the colds too. Merry Christmas Linda!
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And to you, Lynda!
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I watched Love Actually for the umpteenth time this week. It’s a pre-Christmas ritual. The entire cast of that movie is wonderful, but I cast my vote for Colin Firth. I guess we’ll have to tussle for him! 🙂 Merry Christmas my new friend!
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I don’t think we can be friends if you’re going to steal Colin Firth from me… 😉
But Merry Christmas anyway 😀
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