I read this Oscar Wilde quote today:
We have really everything in common with America nowadays except, of course, language.
He was a bit of a bitch, wasn’t he?
The quote reminded me of an Anglo-EU Translation Guide I once read. I thought you might enjoy it.
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I am a little fat. I like food; what can I say? I have dull hair: mousey. I don’t wear much make-up and have no need of a dressing table. If I look like a bag lady, I chose my own clothes. If I look nice, the Hub picked them for me. Despite all this, I am a little vain. This photograph is from 2003. I had to go back that far to find one of me that I liked. But I don’t really care: my husband still thinks I’m beautiful and if he doesn’t, he loves me enough to lie about it. I’m lucky. I have two boys. They never lie to me. Still, you can't have everything.
The Laughing Housewife 
Very amusing 😀
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Quite. 🙂
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it all makes sense to me now :-). Malteser time!
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Quite 😀
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Are you talking widely or wildly? (Do I hear you groan?) I agree with all of them except Quite Good: Americans read that as excellent. I have sometimes queried comments on my blog because I thought they were damning with faint praise, whereas they were really complimenting me!
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Quite 🙂 🙂
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Never mind the translation for EU- that reads remarkably like a manager I used to have… I had to learn to translate her ‘very interesting’ and realise that she thought I was crazy rather than brave 😦
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Quite.
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Just as in Ireland if you ask us to do something that we really have no intention of doing and in fact are probably insulted to be even asked our answer appears to be in the affirmative – e.g.
“Would you like me to punch you in the head?
“Sure, yeah, go ahead I’d love that.”
The problem is, just like the English answers, to fully understand them one needs to be well versed in sarcastic tones and the arch of the eye-brow.
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Quite interesting 🙂
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Oh, that’s brilliant! (And in Australia, that really means it’s good 🙂 )
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I found the table very helpful Tilly thank you!
Folks wonder why us literal thinking Aspie/Auties struggle with communication.
Need I say more.
Love and hugs my friend.
Lisa. xx 🙂
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I think you’ve said quite enough 😀
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Aah… I hear what you say…
Xixixi 🙂
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So true! Reminds me, in turn, of any sentence beginning with, ‘I don’t want to …’ (worry you, or be insulting, or insinuate that you don’t know what you are doing etc) Translation: ‘I have every intention to …”
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My comment: “Great post!”
What you think I mean: “She’s done it again, she’s the most brilliant blogger ever!”
What I really meant: “This is her lamest post yet. I can’t believe she thinks I don’t understand exactly what she means. She obviously doesn’t know I’m a charter member of The Mensa Society.”
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I’m glad you cleared that up.
Guess what I really mean??
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Us poor Americans always saddled with the translator books why can’t everyone just speak English like we do in America?
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because we did it first!
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I really enjoy listening to your Parliament on C-SPAN. I expect a brawl to break out at anytime.
PS You wouln’t like it if I stayed with you, I am a fairly but not nutty conservative and we might get into an argument. Actually, being an American that means I am a Liberal which is NOT a Socialist, which I suspect all Laborites in England are. Dianne
PPS David says I am an “Old Democrat” how should I respond??
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Unclean! Unclean! Calling me a Laborite!! Conservative to the core 🙂
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And you’re still welcome. But maybe just for lunch 😉
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Love it! As a Canadian, I hopefully “get it” a little better than my southern neighbours.
I saw an interview with Daniel Radcliffe on Jay Leno, where he was using some very proper English grammar and a few expressions, and Jay says, “for God’s sakes, would you talk English!”
to which Daniel, godlovehim, promptly side-eyed his reply: “I am.”
brilliant. Fan.For.Life.
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Hilarious! The one that got to me was: YOU MUST COME TO DINNER. I’ll keep that in mind the next time I make it to England. Lol.
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We Americans do have a way of beating around the proverbial bush, don’t we? No wonder we can’t barter world peace…no one understands our English even if they understand English! 😉
Great post!
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An obsolete quote… and yet still remembered! He’s a great guy Wilde. ^^ lol great post!
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Brilliant, Tilly, and SO true!!!
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I’ll bear it in mind. 😉
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That’s not bad, Tilly!
I eventually learned to translate my husband’s reaction to a new dish: “It’s okay” means “Great” if accompanied by smacking of the lips, but means “Average” if said with a shrug. If he hates it he just rolls his eyes and I tell him he can cook his own bloody dinner if he feels like that…
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Couples develop a language all their own, don’t they?
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Reblogged this on Emotfit's Blog and commented:
LAUGH AND PLAY Reblogging a laugh, but also some thing to think about. Sometimes, just saying what you mean works better, particularly if you don’t say it mean.
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I always say what I mean, generally blurting it out 🙂 I have no tact gene.
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When the English say ‘quite’ what do they mean?
🙂
http://www.macmillandictionary.com/dictionary/british/quite
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the British column is correct, the other is taking it all so literally, poor creatures
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I love this, Tilly: and I can hear myself saying a lot of it. Erk.
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I have been informed by those who purport to know me quite well that I have my own translation guide:
Janie says: Is that what you think? Janie means: You must be stupid.
Janie says: We could do that. Janie means: There’s no way in Hell we’ll actually do that.
Janie says: Well, I suppose. Janie means: I could see it, but only in some warped and twisted reality that bears no similarity to our own.
I simply posit it’s not what you say, but the way you say it. Inflection is everything, baby!
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Are you English? 😀
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Thank you for the list Tilly, this is something new for me.. A little dictionary that I should bring it when I visit Europe, one day 😀
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Don’t take it too seriously.
Translation: take it seriously 🙂
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As they say in Safrica, jawellnofine ;p
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yes, but, no but
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If I had a penny for the ‘YOU MUST COME TO DINNER!’ invites I wouldn’t need to do the lottery.
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Can’t believe no one follows up on that for you 🙂
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Ahem… he wasn’t lying. English is spoken in both nations but somewhat differently… 😉
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Just a little… 🙂
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Totally brilliant!
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