101/1001 (Week 100)

It has been almost four months since I last updated you on my 101 tasks in 1001 days challenge, mostly because it takes almost four months to write out the name of the challenge.

Do NaNoWriMo

I did do NaNoWriMo, sort of i.e. I got bored and gave up half way through.  I suspect than means I won’t complete the next challenge on the list:

Win NaNoWriMo.

English: Animated cartoon on a exercise bike (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Ride my bike twenty out of thirty days

We are at Day 708 of the 1001 days and I have ridden my bike a total of zero times.  

On the plus side, I have told 708 jokes.

Expose myself to twenty new experiences (12/20)

Only had one new experience in sixteen weeks: wore a granny outfit and then shared the look with the world.  My post on the velour track suit refers.

Hit 250,000 visitors on my blog (289,099/250,000)

I completed this challenge and posted a photograph to prove it.  Things have slowed down since then: WordPress made it possible to comment on blogs via email, without having to visit.

Nice, WordPress – find a way to reduce everyone’s stats; I’m sure we all love you for it.

I need to set a new target; what do you think it should be?  There are 43 weeks left so please make it realistic, given WordPress’s propensity for scaring away actual visitors.

Free verse poem about loo roll theft, toilet, the office, Hackney, London, UK (Photo credit: gruntzooki)

Write 1001 new poems

I have written 688 so I am only 20 poems behind.  I usually catch up in April, which is National Poetry Writing Month.

This is the one challenge above all others which I am determined to complete.

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Make thirty submissions to competitions or publishers (29/30)

I have submitted five times in the last sixteen weeks, counting multiple poems to the same publisher/competition as one. If I have had success, you’ve heard about it.  I’m not one to hide my light under a bushel; I’m more likely to set the bushel on fire in my enthusiasm to share.

Films & Books

I reached my target and then some to watch 101 new films (114/101), but I am only halfway to my target of reading new books (51/101).  I have done lots of reading, but it tends to be of books that I love.  If I want to reach my target, I have to read 1.15 books a week between now and the end of the challenge.  It’s doable, but I’ll have to give up movies.

the Biggest loser strategy (Photo credit: HikingArtist.com)

 

Joke 708

Funny Sign (Photo credit: mrapplegate)

Quote…Unquote

• Visitors to Longforth Road public toilets might be interested to know they are now being powered by wind.  (Wellington Weekly News)
  

  Funny Sign (Photo credit: TheYoYoMaN)

• June 10-16: Open Bowels Tournament Teignmouth. (Events Leaflet for South Devon)
• If Tesco, BHS, ASDA and others can supervise toilets effectively, it’s time our council got to the bottom of the matter. (Wrexham Leader)

This next one isn’t toilet related but it did prompt me to suggest to the Hub that, if he still wanted a daughter, we could always buy one, if he didn’t mind secondhand children:

• Nearly New Baby Sale (Poster on an Altrincham roundabout)

Funny Sign (Photo credit: jamacdonald)

And finally…

A priest ran out of petrol on his way home.   Fortunately, the village garage was only about half a mile away.  Amazingly, the garage did not have any petrol containers.  The priest pleaded that the garage owner must have a container that would hold half a gallon of petrol.  After much searching the proprietor came up with a chamber pot.  Although it was not strictly legal, they filled the chamber pot with petrol and the priest set off happily back to his car.

Just as the priest was decanting the petrol from the chamber pot into his tank a lorry driver stopped, wound down his window and said, ‘Father, I have heard of the miracle of changing water into wine, but I think you’re pushing your luck this time.’

Funny Signs or Pictures 09 (Photo credit: DrJohnBullas)

First quotes and joke from Will & Guy.

Funny Signs or Pictures 07 (Photo credit: DrJohnBullas)