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Echoes from the Deep

8 Jun

Less humour, more information today.  Or, if you’re reading this in America, less humor, more information today.  Does my English spelling irritate you?  I confess, American spelling used to make my teeth itch until I took The Open University course U210 about the English language and discovered a) I was a language snob and b) America changed spellings after 1776 as a continuation of the Revolution.  A sort of Declaration Against The Pedants.  That was when I forgave you for dropping the extraneous ‘u’.  Or shold that be extraneos ‘**‘?

I’m losy at softening yo p, aren’t I? 

I want you to pay close attention to the next bit, because it is about my beloved firstborn, Tory Boy, who is hardly ever mentioned these days because he’s too busy living his life to call his mother.  And that’s as it should be, the books say.  Stupid books.  He does at least call when he wants something, so I’m grateful for that.  I’m a mother; I have no pride. 

What he wants – and even asked politely – is for me to tell you about his latest project.  For those who are fairly new here, Tory Boy is a politics student who intends to rule the world one day (teachers be warned: you’re off to Antarctica), but he has been temporarily sidetracked by radio.  Or is it a sidetrack…?  If you want to conquer the world, the airwaves are a good place to start.

Tonight, Tory Boy is producing a live radio play for Bailrigg FM, Lancaster University’s campus radio station, and he would like to attract more than five listeners (students have the irritating habit of going out on Friday nights) so, if your ears are free and you want to prove you are slavishly devoted to me, check it out: http://www.bailriggfm.co.uk/

The play starts at nine p.m. UK time.  You can check how that relates to your time zone by clicking http://www.timeanddate.com/worldclock/

Here’s the blurb:

Echoes From The Deep: A Bailrigg FM Production.  Written by Tim Mackworth-Praed.  The first radio play to air on Bailrigg FM in over five years. 
 
Echoes from the Deep is the story of Annie Lensman, a woman attempting to deal with life’s problems as she ages.  Throughout the play she is comforted by the many tales of her Uncle Walter, a benevolent figure who provides continual support. 
 
Told in two halves, the play focuses on three stories brought to life by Uncle Walter:  one fantastical and poetic tale told when Annie is a little girl;  a caustic and unnerving story told when Annie is a teenager; and a psychological and tragic story told to the now middle-aged Annie. However, Uncle Walter has a sadness of his own to address…

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Sounds intriguing, doesn’t it?  And as this is a personal favour to me, I will eat a Malteser in honour of every person who tells me they listened.  And another for those who actually did listen.

*

There you go, son!  Will you visit me now?

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Joke 442

8 Jun

 

Washing on the Line

Washing on the Line (Photo credit: Alex E. Proimos)

Thanks to life.aisle for letting me use this one.

 

An old couple moved into a new neighbourhood.  One morning while eating breakfast, the wife watched her neighbour hang out the washing.

“That laundry isn’t very clean,” she said. “She doesn’t know how to wash properly. Perhaps she needs better soap powder.”  Her husband looked on, but remained silent.

Every time her neighbour would hang her washing out to dry, the wife would make the same comments.

About one month later, the woman was surprised to see a nice clean wash on the line and said to her husband, “Look!  She’s learned how to wash properly at last!  I wonder who taught her?”

The husband said, “I got up early this morning and cleaned our windows.”

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