A Load Of Balls From WordPress

19 Oct
Superballs

Image by oskay via Flickr

If you found $1000 worth of superballs, and had a free afternoon, what creative use could you put them towards? Can you think of a clever way to use them or a prank you could pull on a friend or co-worker? Write about it.

Let’s forget for the moment that this is a fun premise, and look at the logistics of it:

I find $1000 worth of superballs. 

How many balls is that?  If they cost $1 each that’s 1000; if they cost 50 cents each that’s 2000; if they cost $1.50 that’s, um, somewhere in between.  Or less?  No, more.  No, less.  Definitely less!  Is it?

Premise: I find $1000 worth of superballs.

Result: My head explodes trying to do maths.

What are superballs? 

They are colourful bouncy balls made of rubber.  Rubber is a natural substance, so that’s okay.  Of course, lava and human excrement are also natural substances, but not very nice ones; or particularly good for the environment.  Better if they are made of plastic.  Recyclable plastic.  But what if they’re not?  Plastic doesn’t bounce much so they might need an additive and then no longer be recyclable and I’ll be murdering the planet.

Premise: I find $1000 worth of superballs.

Result: My head explodes trying to do green maths.

Where do I find these killerballs? 

In the street?  Loose on the ground?  How will I gather them all before they harm the environment, choke little animals or are stolen by the neighbours?  In a box, then.  How big a box?  How big are the balls?  Can I carry it by myself or will I need a crane and a van?  What will that cost?  Will using a crane and a van increase my carbon footprint and do more damage than if I just left the superballs to fester in the street?

Premise: I find $1000 worth of superballs.

Result: My head explodes from question mark overload.

They’re in a building you say? 

Can I claim them once I’ve been released from prison, having served two years for breaking & entering and burglary?

Premise: I find $1000 worth of superballs.

Result: I make ‘friends’ with a girl called Bill and start a new life on my parole, releasing environmentally friendly bouncy balls into the wild.

Back to the value. 

I find a $1000 worth of superballs.  Where they imported from the States?  Is it Australian dollars?  What’s the exchange rate on that? 

Premise: I find £632.651/£654.001 worth of superballs. 

Result: I lobby the British Government to join the Ausmerican Dollar system.   

To sum up.

Let’s say, for the sake of argument, a WordPress prompter comes to my house in the dead of night; leaves a reasonably sized, reasonably priced box of environmentally friendly superballs on my doorstep; and a note asking me to write about what I would do.

Premise: I find $1000 worth of friendly superballs on my doorstep, and a note from WordPress.

Result: I close my account.  I have to: crazy WordPress prompters are stalking me.

*

51 Responses to “A Load Of Balls From WordPress”

  1. BeckySefton October 19, 2011 at 11:20 #

    LOL LOL 😀

    Like

  2. vivinfrance October 19, 2011 at 11:21 #

    My advice: ignore them. You could find better things to do with your time, like writing poetry.

    Like

    • Tilly Bud October 19, 2011 at 11:30 #

      I just couldn’t – I LOVE these prompts! They are so much fun 🙂

      Like

  3. granny1947 October 19, 2011 at 12:55 #

    The prompters must open your posts with fear in their hearts.
    Thanks for the lovely laugh.

    Like

  4. earlybird October 19, 2011 at 13:12 #

    I expect they’ll be sending you over to Blogger quite soon now.

    This was fun but I agree with Viv. 🙂

    Like

    • Tilly Bud October 21, 2011 at 08:58 #

      Don’t be putting ideas into their heads!

      Like

  5. SammyDee October 19, 2011 at 13:42 #

    Great answer. I was chuckling as I read it. 🙂

    If I found $1000 worth of superballs I’d forget the prank – I’d sell them and go on holiday instead. (You’re right; my answer is predicable and boring! 😉 )

    Like

  6. Kate Kresse October 19, 2011 at 13:52 #

    Wish I had read yours earlier—LOL times 10! That is how to handle the silly prompts. I tell you, sometimes I take myself way too seriously! Thanks for keeping the laughter in my life, Tilly! I would love to put the superballs in a room that is abour 4 feet high and somehow causes the balls to bounce from ceiling to floor forever—sometimes speeding up, sometimes slowing down…but never stopping [you know, kind of like a Toyota ;-)]

    Like

    • Tilly Bud October 21, 2011 at 09:00 #

      Hard on the eyes and ears but great fun, I bet 🙂

      Like

  7. misswhiplash October 19, 2011 at 14:13 #

    I did not know what superballs were. I had no intention a doing that topic anyway but if I had..what I would have said… is show me the man with 1000 superballs….

    Like

  8. countingducks October 19, 2011 at 15:26 #

    Good for you. That had me wheezing and laughing as I read through your post. Of course your’e maths is as good as mine so I was as lst as you where by then. The rest just followed on from there. Ive never paid any attention to their prompts but I will be from now on. Perhaps I can get a job as a wordpress prompter. Now there’s a career for you

    Like

    • Tilly Bud October 21, 2011 at 09:03 #

      Now why would you put such a low value on yourself? 😉

      Like

  9. laurieanichols October 19, 2011 at 15:40 #

    I love how you question, I should do more of that. I see prompt no matter what I feel honor bound to take it seriously and answer. I must answer prompt. I am part of dailypost2011, I must answer. Ha, Ha. You are very clever. I always laugh after I read your posts, thank you.

    Like

    • Tilly Bud October 21, 2011 at 09:04 #

      And you just gave me the biggest smile of my day; thank you 🙂

      Like

  10. Katherine Gordy Levine October 19, 2011 at 15:50 #

    Your creativity could bring about world peace, of course it could also get your killed as not enough people want peace and so many of those have no sense of humor. Don’t mock God or Mohammad. As I have noted I love you, but I won’t stalk you, just enjoy what you have to offer. Do you do standup? .

    Like

    • Tilly Bud October 21, 2011 at 09:08 #

      No, my comic timing. is shocking It’s better. to write comedy as I can. fix mistakes 🙂

      Like

  11. Big Al October 19, 2011 at 16:06 #

    I wonder if whoever conceived this prompt has heard back yet about their application to Mensa?

    Like

  12. SchmidleysScribbling October 19, 2011 at 18:04 #

    Our gym instructor tossed a thousand hand-sized rubber balls in the pool one day. They flew everywhere, smacking people in the face. The person who got a wet bathing suit in the face was not happy. Turns out the instuctor had thrown the suit in with the balls the last time she used them.

    BTW At 1.50 per ball, if you spent a $1000 you would get 666.6667 balls. At 1.00 per ball, you would get 1000 balls; At 2.00 you would get 500 balls. ??? At 50 cents you would get 2,000 balls. $1.50 is not halfway between 50 cents and 1.00. .75 cents is and would buy you 1333.3334 balls.

    Like

    • Tilly Bud October 21, 2011 at 09:13 #

      I would thank you but my head just exploded 🙂

      Like

  13. jezibelle October 19, 2011 at 18:26 #

    We wouldn’t have to wonder who has the most balls! Thanks for the laugh.

    Like

  14. kateshrewsday October 19, 2011 at 20:13 #

    😀 One of your best ever, Tilly. What a load of superballs..

    Like

  15. nailingjellotoatree October 19, 2011 at 20:22 #

    Bwahaha…head exploding from math! Sounds like my life. Except I lose count of my kids not my balls. 🙂

    Like

    • Tilly Bud October 21, 2011 at 09:18 #

      It is hard to tell them apart sometimes; especially if they’ve had too much sugar 🙂

      Like

  16. 1sojournal October 20, 2011 at 05:04 #

    Thanks for the laughter and a wonderful memory of a friend who tried out a superball in a closed room with framed glass prints hanging on the walls. I’ve never laughed so hard seeing the look on her face. It was priceless. Superballs are weapons of destruction in the wrong hands. Be careful,

    Elizabeth

    Like

    • Tilly Bud October 21, 2011 at 09:22 #

      Good grief!! HOW I would have loved to have been there 🙂

      Like

  17. ElizOF October 20, 2011 at 07:28 #

    You could give the balls back and save yourself some headache… ask for a good Samaritan tip. 😆

    Like

  18. sarsm October 20, 2011 at 08:24 #

    This should be FP’d!! Brilliant Tilly. You’ve given me a great start to the day.

    Like

  19. sarsm October 20, 2011 at 08:34 #

    I love it, love it, love it! So I pressed it. Hope I did it right!!

    Like

  20. lotan October 20, 2011 at 09:17 #

    Great piece of philosophy.
    I bet wordpress thought nowhere near as much about putting together their prompt (and it is quite contrived) as you did dissecting it!

    Like

  21. monicafay October 20, 2011 at 09:39 #

    i used to be obsessed with super balls. haha loved this.

    i’d love to get on your blogroll. i wrote a couple blogs about weight.

    black fat vs. white fat http://monicafay.wordpress.com/2010/10/12/black-fat-vs-white-fat/

    and the etiquette rules of fat and skinny. http://monicafay.wordpress.com/2011/09/12/the-rules-of-fat-and-skinny/

    hope you like it!!

    Like

    • Tilly Bud October 21, 2011 at 09:35 #

      I’m glad you enjoyed it! Thanks for visiting; I’m off to visit you now 🙂

      Like

  22. Lorna's Voice October 20, 2011 at 14:10 #

    Tilly, you fell into their trap! You used their prompt and wrote about it. You’re only encouraging them. What’s next? Talk about your favorite letter of the Greek Alphabet and why you love it so much. 😉

    Like

  23. RoryBore October 20, 2011 at 17:31 #

    LOL…. best laugh of the week without a doubt. perhaps even the month.

    my kids like to stick them in my potted plants. not sure what the logic is behind that. colorful rocks? drainage?

    Like

  24. Perfecting Motherhood October 20, 2011 at 17:42 #

    Well, is the WP people had $1000 in superballs, I’d think they’d have an idea of what to do with them to take care of you, miss smarty pants…

    Like

    • Tilly Bud October 21, 2011 at 09:39 #

      lol! I hope they don’t read your comment 🙂

      Like

  25. Robert! October 20, 2011 at 21:17 #

    You’re post is pure genius. I cant say anything else, you made me laugh so hard, you cant imagine. Well done. I think you had a great time writing this.

    I would take my hat of if I had one!

    Like

    • Tilly Bud October 21, 2011 at 09:41 #

      Why, thank you, Robert!

      You’re right: I did have a great time writing this.

      Thanks for your visit 🙂

      Like

  26. Pseu October 23, 2011 at 19:02 #

    Bobkers

    Like

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. CoWAfunhere « The Laughing Housewife - October 24, 2011

    […] came on the post about superballs.  What appealed to me was the image of enraged WordPress prompters pelting me with rubber balls.  […]

    Like

  2. Today’s cow is getting bonked on the head with a superball | Every day I see a cow - October 25, 2011

    […] About a month ago, Tilly decided to award the CoWAbunger once a week to a post commenter with the comment that made her laugh the most. Today she decided to have CoWAfunhere and deliver the award to me for a comment I made regarding her post on making fun of the WordPress daily prompt on superballs. […]

    Like

  3. I’m Back! « The Laughing Housewife - October 24, 2012

    […] A Load Of Balls From WordPress […]

    Like

I welcome your comments but be warned: I'm menopausal and as likely to snarl as smile. Wine or Maltesers are an acceptable bribe; or a compliment about my youthful looks and cheery disposition will do in a pinch.

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