Joke 818

19 Jun
4 – 1878

4 – 1878 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)



Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slowdown in overall system performance — particularly in the flower and jewellery applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.  In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as NFL 5.0, NBA 3.0. And Golf Clubs 4.1.  Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.5 simply crashes the system. I’ve tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

What can I do?

Signed, Desperate



Dear Desperate:

First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an Operating System. Please enter the command: “http: I Thought You Loved Me.htm” and try to download Tears 6.2 and don’t forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update.  If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.  

But remember, over use of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5 Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background, that will eventually seize control of all your system resources).

Also, do not attempt to re-install the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Lingerie 7.7

Good Luck, 

Tech Support


Thanks to Charlie at readbetweentheminds for this one.


12 Responses to “Joke 818”

  1. siggiofmaine June 19, 2013 at 04:03 #

    Sigh. But I’ll share it for sure !
    Peace, Siggi


  2. Terry June 19, 2013 at 04:19 #

    that is so adorable. I loved it!!!!


  3. jmgoyder June 19, 2013 at 04:29 #

    Very clever!


  4. slpmartin June 19, 2013 at 04:35 #

    I thought you might enjoy that one….it made me laugh.


  5. benzeknees June 19, 2013 at 07:16 #

    Laughed my ass off!


  6. lanceleuven June 19, 2013 at 12:47 #

    “DO NOT install Mother-in-law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background, that will eventually seize control of all your system resources).”



  7. Grannymar June 19, 2013 at 12:49 #

    That is so good!


  8. Mimi June 19, 2013 at 13:08 #



  9. Al June 19, 2013 at 13:28 #

    For your info, Romance 9.5 software now has an upgrade (9.5.5) which should increase the performance of the hard drive.


  10. mairedubhtx June 19, 2013 at 13:33 #

    Very clever!


  11. Perfecting Motherhood June 24, 2013 at 06:07 #

    Haha, that’s about it!


I welcome your comments but be warned: I'm menopausal and as likely to snarl as smile. Wine or Maltesers are an acceptable bribe; or a compliment about my youthful looks and cheery disposition will do in a pinch.

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